Ode to a Butterfly

Ode to a Butterfly

A Poem by Augustus

Does nectar grow less sweet with passing Time?
Your unrest causes winds to slow their pace
The beating of your wings in pantomime
Now paints your tale of ephemeral grace
Ignoble glutton, laying green to waste
But hiding dreams behind a devil's face
A treacherous wait, a caterpillar's haste
One day to be absolved of its foul crime
To savour long and deep, Redemption's taste

Then patient weaving till the world is sealed
And all of its travails are shunned by silk
In pale confines a soul entombed and healed
An infant feeding on Compassion's milk
Like Tutankhamen's crypt, a sleep of kings
Embracing pleasures of a different ilk
A prayer to solicit a gift of wings
A prowess yet unknown to be revealed
A promise of unbridled wanderings

And what became of that eternal thirst?
Full seven days of dancing on the breeze
The fleeting days too short to fear the worst
The heart too warm for lakes of lust to freeze
But now the beating of that heart is slow
Performing in the shadows of the trees
The age-old sacred rite of letting go
Oblivious to springtime's rich outburst
In tune with twilight's ever fading glow

And so you're tired of your resplendence!
As your mind spins another chrysalis
A shattered shell remains of what was once
A flowing fountain of untainted bliss
And so you choose to kiss the earth goodbye
A transcendental metamorphosis
To break the shackles of the deep blue sky
To taste Ambrosia and to steal a chance
The breathing of Existence to espy
 


© 2013 Augustus


Author's Note

Augustus
Tutankhamen was an ancient Egyptian pharoah, or king. Egyptian kings were mummified and buried in burial chambers inside pyramids along with several of their valuable possessions.

My Review

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Featured Review

This is absolutely beautiful. I read it multiple times in one sitting. It reminds me of John Keats' Ode to a Nightingale - one of my favorites, and I am guessing yours as well? Not only did you emulate his style of writing, but you took it and made it your own. I'm impressed with your use of meter (I still struggle with it, which is why I usually stick to free verse) and with the imagery you used to bring your poem to life. You possess incredible talent, and I do hope you keep writing - I am looking forward to reading more of your work!

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Augustus

9 Years Ago

Thank you so much for your astute and generous review, Aleeya! Yes, I am a big fan of Keats, and sha.. read more
Aleeya R

9 Years Ago

You're welcome! Yes, Keats' poems are lovely, I too am a fan. I agree, metered verse is pleasing to .. read more



Reviews

This is a beautifully written poem. It is a clever way to bring in things from history into it, and it fits very well.

"Then patient weaving till the world is sealed
And all of its travails are shunned by silk
In pale confines a soul entombed and healed
An infant feeding on Compassion's milk
Like Tutankhamen's crypt, a sleep of kings
Embracing pleasures of a different ilk
A prayer to solicit a gift of wings
A prowess yet unknown to be revealed
A promise of unbridled wanderings"

This part is very well written, and one of the stanza's that stood out to me.

Overall, the poem is very a wonderful, beautiful poem.

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Augustus

10 Years Ago

Thank you!
This is just beautiful your imagery, connections everything! i like how the meaning of the poem goes so much further, beyond the words. Great job!

Posted 10 Years Ago


Augustus

10 Years Ago

Thank you so much! :)
Wow, I absolutely loved this. It's so graceful and beautiful! I especially loved the line, "As your mind spins another chrysalis." I know it's simple and pertains directly to the butterfly, but it's perfect.
I definitely respect you as a writer, as I always will, but this just proves your talent.
It makes me miss my ancient writing style.
I like to delve into the meaning with my teeth a little too hard just because you don't see this style written often. I know how long it takes to write something like this.
All I can say is, great rhymes that aren't forced, wonderful and graceful meanings, and great ending. I think I'll just mull over this a while longer...


Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Augustus

10 Years Ago

Thank you so much Hayley! Wonderful to have you comment on my verse. :)
A genius poem of analogies as you comparing king Tut to a butterfly. All the similarities you point out make such graceful sense.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Augustus

10 Years Ago

Thank you!
I enjoyed how you went through the different stages of a butterfly’s life in a philosophical way. This poem's classical style has an adorable cadence to it. My poem "First Love" is somewhat like this one, but with a different more modern rhyming structure.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Augustus

10 Years Ago

Thanks a lot! I'll read your works soon.
Aethereal

10 Years Ago

You're welcome!
As I read your poem, I remember the movie series "The Mummy" with Brendan Fraser as the lead actor.
Glad you have that author's note above, so I can fully relate.

To tell you honestly, I made an attempt in making a poem with iambic pentameter (a sonnet) last summer vacation but I surrendered. LOL. Making a sonnet is not an easy task so I decided to study more about it which is so hard for me to do with my busy schedule. Since writing is only a hobby, I want to do it to enjoy and not to pressure myself. So I just write with my own natural style. Perhaps next summer vacation, I can make one.

Going back to your poem, I enjoyed reading such rhyme scheme. Nice analogy of life and a butterfly's metamorphosis. Forgive me if I'm wrong, but it's how I interpret it.

I can't say much but a salute to a brilliant poet like you.





Posted 10 Years Ago


Augustus

10 Years Ago

Thanks a lot for your kind words! Writing a sonnet is indeed difficult. I have some experience with .. read more
Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)

10 Years Ago

You're welcome. :)
This has a definite feel of eighteenth century verse, complex, philosophical, and intense. It's probably not the sort of thing that my twentieth century mind can get around too easily. Never a great reader of the classics, I tend toward modern simplicity in language, easy comprehension, storylines which are accessible to the modern reader. You have done an incredible job on this, and I salute you, but I feel you were born too late for this style to engage the modern mind.

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

a truly brilliant work, i cant review it as some of the others have, i have no idea of lambic pentameter and structured poetry and all, however it is a really impressive write up, superb stuff, keep it up

Posted 10 Years Ago


..Then patient weaving till the world is sealed
And all of its travails are shunned by silk

I can see why Abdul here loves this so much. Heavy diction and rhyme. It all seems so distant to me now. I've been immersed in Imagism so much, that I've lost touch with the Classics. This, for once, was a welcome sight. And to have used such a complicated rhyme scheme, you're undoubtedly talented.

Though, I have to say, I don't see why this 'ode' should be for a Butterfly. Maybe it has deeper implications. If it doesn't, then I don't see the connection here. The stanzas are, so to speak, general in sense. But this doesn't reduce the quality of the poem in any way.

Keep writing.

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Augustus

10 Years Ago

Thanks Dinesh. The ode does have deeper implications. But it is unequivocally addressed to a butterf.. read more
Haha, what can I say? Seriously, what can I say that hasn't already been said? Perhaps this poem deserves tears, but I but can only laugh in happiness, partly because of the brilliance of the poem, and partly because of a more personal vindication that structured poetry can hold its own against free verse any day. Questions of which kind of poetry is better become redundant because they are all suited to their purposes, as this poem is perfectly suited to its.

Coming to the poem per se, I would like to discuss this both as regards its form and its content. Has there been a precedent for this rhyme scheme? It feels both complex and yet natural. It moves the poem forward in gentle thrusts without ever seeming to rush. The presence of an unrhymed penultimate line in each stanza fortifies that feeling. The Iambic Pentameter, of course, is the de facto choice of meter for a poem like this. Perfectly suited to the mood, as it unfolds languorously, making reading the poem feel like a sip of coffee on a lazy Sunday afternoon.

The content, though at first glance appears to be simplistic, is actually mesmerizing as well. Before delving into the deeper levels of any poem, I think it is important to read the primary meaning as well. And I think it is beautiful and simple. The life cycle of a butterfly painted vividly, in broad brushstrokes and yet beautifully describing some intricacies of its life. Delving deeper, I think it might be drawing parallels to human life as well, even if you didn't intend it so. People drawing coccoons around themselves and sealing themselves off from the world.. That seems to be a common occurrence! And also, how amazing is it that you used Tutankhamen's tomb as an analogy for a butterfly's coccoon? Very amazing indeed.

Of special interest to me, though, is the last stanza. I can't for the life of me come up with such extremely splendid rhymes! It makes me feel like a Salieri to your Mozart! :) I think it is apt that you used the word metamorphosis, for I believe that this poem is your metamorphosis into a modern great! I hope to discuss more with you if I get to meet you in person, hopefully, on June 3.

I don't think I have any adjectives to describe this poem. So I'll just add this to my favourites and give it a 100

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Abdul Aziz

10 Years Ago

I've got a call letter for interview for admission into Ph.D. research in Neuroscience at IISc, so y.. read more
Abdul Aziz

10 Years Ago

I wonder how I missed that rhyme in the penultimate line. My bad.
I think whether a poem seem.. read more
Augustus

10 Years Ago

You've echoed my sentiments about structure and soul of the poem. It's great that you'll be here for.. read more

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Added on May 2, 2013
Last Updated on May 2, 2013

Author

Augustus
Augustus

Cambridge, MA



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