Ode to a Butterfly

Ode to a Butterfly

A Poem by Augustus

Does nectar grow less sweet with passing Time?
Your unrest causes winds to slow their pace
The beating of your wings in pantomime
Now paints your tale of ephemeral grace
Ignoble glutton, laying green to waste
But hiding dreams behind a devil's face
A treacherous wait, a caterpillar's haste
One day to be absolved of its foul crime
To savour long and deep, Redemption's taste

Then patient weaving till the world is sealed
And all of its travails are shunned by silk
In pale confines a soul entombed and healed
An infant feeding on Compassion's milk
Like Tutankhamen's crypt, a sleep of kings
Embracing pleasures of a different ilk
A prayer to solicit a gift of wings
A prowess yet unknown to be revealed
A promise of unbridled wanderings

And what became of that eternal thirst?
Full seven days of dancing on the breeze
The fleeting days too short to fear the worst
The heart too warm for lakes of lust to freeze
But now the beating of that heart is slow
Performing in the shadows of the trees
The age-old sacred rite of letting go
Oblivious to springtime's rich outburst
In tune with twilight's ever fading glow

And so you're tired of your resplendence!
As your mind spins another chrysalis
A shattered shell remains of what was once
A flowing fountain of untainted bliss
And so you choose to kiss the earth goodbye
A transcendental metamorphosis
To break the shackles of the deep blue sky
To taste Ambrosia and to steal a chance
The breathing of Existence to espy
 


© 2013 Augustus


Author's Note

Augustus
Tutankhamen was an ancient Egyptian pharoah, or king. Egyptian kings were mummified and buried in burial chambers inside pyramids along with several of their valuable possessions.

My Review

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Featured Review

This is absolutely beautiful. I read it multiple times in one sitting. It reminds me of John Keats' Ode to a Nightingale - one of my favorites, and I am guessing yours as well? Not only did you emulate his style of writing, but you took it and made it your own. I'm impressed with your use of meter (I still struggle with it, which is why I usually stick to free verse) and with the imagery you used to bring your poem to life. You possess incredible talent, and I do hope you keep writing - I am looking forward to reading more of your work!

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Augustus

6 Years Ago

Thank you so much for your astute and generous review, Aleeya! Yes, I am a big fan of Keats, and sha.. read more
Aleeya R

6 Years Ago

You're welcome! Yes, Keats' poems are lovely, I too am a fan. I agree, metered verse is pleasing to .. read more



Reviews

This is an amazing write. You have blended metaphor and personification into a beautiful ode indeed.

Posted 7 Years Ago


If i'd not seen your name beneath the title of this poem, i'd have thought it belonged to one of the Greats, tis truly wonderful! And now - my goodness.. i have to give you reasons for using the word 'wonderful': firstly you use what i call melodic metre to the nth degree, make the words sing yet in a naturally restrained voice; you thread words in a near perfect way, ' And what became of that eternal thirst? ~~ Full seven days of dancing on the breeze ~~ The fleeting days too short to fear the worst ~~ The heart too warm for lakes of lust to freeze ~~ But now .. ' You've created a poetic myth about a beautiful creature: its coming and going, its fragility and power, its brightness and fading - the circle of its brief life. And, from start to finish laid your own special place in poetry. Most importantly, your words make me weep .. silly me.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Augustus

7 Years Ago

Speechless, Emma.... :) Can't believe my words actually had the power to make you weep...wow...its t.. read more
emmajoy

7 Years Ago

Sometimes we knew selves better than .. and you certainly do. :)
Amazing sir, what a beautiful ode!

Posted 7 Years Ago


Augustus

7 Years Ago

Thank you! :)
I sit here, transcended, in awe! What a beautiful stunning piece of literature, it really is...
This is all consuming, wow...one of the best pieces I have read of late :)

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Augustus

7 Years Ago

Ah Poppy! So glad you dropped by! And even gladder that you liked it so much! :)
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Sam
good job!

Posted 7 Years Ago


'To savour long and deep, Redemption's taste'

the journey of the butterfly, exquisitely crafted each stanza almost in a breath. i liked the enjambement here, it keeps the rhyme flowing nicley and i think it shows a certain maturity to move away from all the stresses on the last word of the line which a lot of rhyming poetry tends to do. the imagery sits well with the old world nature of the poem taking that familiar and very universal theme of time and painting its transience as symbolized by the short life of the butterfly, the different stages of its existance, each very unique.
the last stanza was my favouirte- that reaching to the sky representing freedom and something essential to the essence of the butterfly, changing from the earth bound state to its true and higher self. i thought you captured something highly sublime in this description. fantastic.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Augustus

7 Years Ago

Thank you for your lovely, insightful review Beth!As you say, the theme is universal, so it was cruc.. read more
Wow, my breath has been unequivocally taken away by this piece...this is a real ode, and they're not easy to come by these days, maybe because they require so much patience and discipline to perfect...you've captured that Romantic voice and structure as well as any modern writer can...really great work my friend :)

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

kublakhan27

7 Years Ago

Thank you my friend, those words do inspire me greatly :) Another reason I haven't done a proper one.. read more
Augustus

7 Years Ago

Ah! I'd love to read some of your structured verse. Drop me a message if there's any particular one .. read more
kublakhan27

7 Years Ago

Will do :) It's 4pm here and I do have some things to do but I'll take a look for ones you might lik.. read more
Thank you Augustus for this gift of excellence in poetry. I strongly believe we are here for the give and take of corrective criticism, however I'm at a loss to offer you any.

I would like to know how and why you chose 9 lines per stanza. It worked well.

Forgive me, I see down below that you addressed my question.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Augustus

7 Years Ago

Thank you for your immensely kind words! I am so glad you asked that question! That is precisely wha.. read more
The Mask

7 Years Ago

Not a rant at all. This is the main reason I came to the WC. To learn. It's fascinating to see th.. read more
Augustus

7 Years Ago

By all means, you may keep my poem and my words if you find them useful. I have also come to WC to s.. read more
I agree with Ken, you are a writer from another time...

This is touching, deeply sad, and glorious in the presentation...
One must ponder on this, for you have written a complex piece... there are twists and turns within every line...
I admit I had to read this aloud to feel the journey...to peel away each metaphorical layer...as if unfurling the butterfly's wings to find her secret of why she is hiding dreams behind a devil's face...

"A shattered shell remains of what was once
A flowing fountain of untainted bliss
And so you choose to kiss the earth goodbye
A transcendental metamorphosis
To break the shackles of the deep blue sky"

Intriguing write!...Beautifully written...~xo~:)

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Augustus

7 Years Ago

Thank you so much Robbie! :) Thanks especially for spending so much time on it and taking the effort.. read more
Robbie~xoxo~

7 Years Ago

Well we will meet in the middle of a century.. (how about that) lol

As for unraveling y.. read more
Augustus

7 Years Ago

It certainly isn't. I know you're very versatile. :) There is a reason I asked you to read my poem. .. read more

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Added on May 2, 2013
Last Updated on May 2, 2013

Author

Augustus
Augustus

Cambridge, MA



About
My name is Shreyas Gokhale. I have a PhD in Physics from the Indian Institute of Science and am currently a Post-doctoral Research Fellow at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. However, I guess.. more..

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