Live Forever.

Live Forever.

A Poem by Silent Pacer
"

Sorrow has just struck my life, and I am trying, to vent through writing, but maybe failing. lol

"

Hush little baby,

don’t make a fret,

Death will come to all,

But it is not your’s yet.

 

Hush up now child,

don’t you cry,

The past have gone,

Though they never truly die.

 

Hush little one,

Do not dwell on their demise,

For they will live forever,

And can never truly die.

 

They will live through memories,

They will live through teachings,

They will live through our memories,

And will learn from their lives.

© 2008 Silent Pacer


Author's Note

Silent Pacer
I have just came into extreme sorrow, and am trying to vent through writing, though the crying is making it hard to think. I am not sure if I like this poem or not. All comments are encuraged, I have been at a lost since the sorrow, and kinda need comments to figure out where I am. Hope that made sense.

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Featured Review

Very nice work and suprisingly different from what i would expect to see from you Silent Pacer. I really really enjoyed this .My only criticism falls on the last stanza. Maybe try"They will live through my memories, and I will learn from their lies" I don't know ? just a suggestion.great stuff young lady.kudos.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Hush little one,

Do not dwell on their demise,

For they will live forever,

And can never truly die.

Loved These Lines Pretty Amazing!!! :)

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I liked this and it reminded me of when I ran around in the haunted house singing hush little baby don't you cry now it's time for you to die. Excellent disturbing piece.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I'm sorry for you loss/sorrow. Keep writing, I know how much it helps.
I agree with Mr. Lopez about the last stanza. Maybe re-word it a bit to make it flow better.
*Hugs*

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very nice work and suprisingly different from what i would expect to see from you Silent Pacer. I really really enjoyed this .My only criticism falls on the last stanza. Maybe try"They will live through my memories, and I will learn from their lies" I don't know ? just a suggestion.great stuff young lady.kudos.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on April 6, 2008
Last Updated on April 7, 2008

Author

Silent Pacer
Silent Pacer

Middle of Nowhere



About
I'm Me, and sometimes me, but only half of the time, then I become something that resembles me. But in all seriousness, I am looking for constructive criticism about my work since I am trying to fur.. more..

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