TIT BITS FROM MY WORLD

TIT BITS FROM MY WORLD

A Poem by JENY
"

WROTE for a contest that asked to enter poems which kids will love to read...

"

TIT BITS FROM MY WORLD

 

When Mamma is late

Tom is my delight

Jerry is my contest

His winning is an alight

From a tight in my chest

 

When school is closed

A difference is ushered

Morning exercise is missed

Morning sleep is wooed, romanced

All time tables are upturned

 

 Science gives way to stories

Maths gives way to paintings

Class rooms give way to dance rooms

Evening strolls welcomes seashores

Where waves becomes my playmates

 

Small is my world

But great are my dreams

Mamma coaches me to dream

Papa instructs me of ways to follow

In the laboratory of my life

I am busy with my hours 

© 2010 JENY


Author's Note

JENY
WROTE for a contest that asked to enter poems which kids will love to read...

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Reviews

I am a kid at heart and i love this .. it is simple enough for a child to grasp but it is deep and has a very good lesson. It is as Daniel says, inspirational.
Good luck in the contest. Wonderful writing.

Chloe

Posted 13 Years Ago


great inspiring work. Hope you one the contest. This seems something kids would really like.

Posted 13 Years Ago


Very interesting and inspiring.

Posted 13 Years Ago


Very interesting poem. Hints at the beauties of childhood and I love the metaphoric approach. This creates a cozy memory I'm sure many can relate to...good write :)

Posted 13 Years Ago


I can see where you are going with this one, but I wasn't able to follow too clearly. It seemed a bit jumpy with broken thought patterns. I don't know about you, but I find it hard to write for a specific reason.

Posted 13 Years Ago


This is strong in direction and substance, a good read.

Posted 13 Years Ago


nice, esp. here when snow days are around the corner....liked the Tom and jerry lines, very clever. Tidbits! Loved this from a child's perspective, learning thru just having the time to explore.

Posted 13 Years Ago


Amazing job you did of it too love!
I can see why children would love to read this :) I really like the
"In the laboratory of my life
I am busy with my hours " lines:)
Beautifully done :)
xx

Posted 13 Years Ago


We learn much from our elders. I have my father's laugh. I have my grandfather patience. I like the complete poem. It was fun to read. A outstanding poem.
Coyote

Posted 13 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.

wonderful empathy...drawing on our own perceptions of time long past and imagining the feelings of children...how our perceptions change as we age...it's all work and responsibility...we lose track of the simplicity of s life of a child...the fascination with everyday things...
Lovely piece...
I might change the words "Tit Bits" in the title to "Tidbits..." which is what I think you mean...
Line 5..."tightness" instead of a "tight" in my chest...
Drop the "s" on "welcomes"...
all minor editing issues that certainly don't take away from the premise of
the poem...more about presentation than content...
Oh, to be that young again...
nice job...


Posted 13 Years Ago



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15 Reviews
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Added on October 31, 2010
Last Updated on October 31, 2010

Author

JENY
JENY

Kerala, Thrissur, India



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