waterfalls

a poem about nature and how it ought to be preserved.

Clashing and slamming against the pebbles

The music of the water,sweet as trebles

Rushing down, picking up speed

As pleasant as music, as annoying as a weed.

 

A roar of sound can be heard.

To describe this"there is no word.

The rush of waters starts to slow

Till the gush turns into a little flow.

 

The flecks of water soar through the air

Wiping away any thoughts of despair.

making its journey, hindered by none

look at it go, a wonderful run.

A shattering splash,it reaches the ground

Tis the place countless have drowned.

The origin of many a  picturesque lake,

Keep it pure for nature’s sake.

 

Clean and pure it had once been

But this won’t ever be again.

heartless humans, tainting what's not theirs.

but nature knows not; it only cares.

 

Let us act and open the door.

To make the earth clean once more.

We now have the magic wand

That can reunite the long lost bond.

 

Author's Note

please review. it means a lot to me.

Reviews

[Stonz P.]

Only one concern I had was that this seemed as a paradox to me but am unsure whether the negative side was intentional as the drowning is not the fault of the waterfalls but the individuals. It only seemed out of place to me:

" A shattering splash,it reaches the ground
Tis the place countless have drowned.
The origin of many a picturesque lake,
Keep it pure for nature’s sake. "

The rest of the poem is good. The meter and rhyme you have used is fine. BUT, I did not connect with the piece and my apologies because there is nothing I can suggest to improve this; maybe, because I don't exactly relate to the psyche in which you wrote it. Or maybe you still had to work on it more..
Do I make sense to you? Please let me know if I don't.

[Surya pradha]

thats understandable, thanks for reading.

[Cindy Marietta]

Love the thought behind this poem. Great thoughts of nature and nice flow!

[Surya pradha]

glad you liked it!

[Angad Waraich]

I enjoyed this piece.
I like your concern for nature.
Could use a little editing.
But a great piece.
Well done.


Thank you.
-Angad

[Surya pradha]

thanks for your praise, Angad!

[Kieta!]

I love the words you used! The poem was so descriptive and beautiful and I could easily imagine a roaring waterfall :) Great job!! :)

[Surya pradha]

thanks a bunch!

[ayesha gupta]

i liked the poem and your concern about nature. you beautifully descirbed about the lake in the starting lines, and then how humans destroyed its beauty. nice write. :)

[Surya pradha]

thanks for reading, glad you liked it!

[Ghost]

This is beautiful, I've been lucky enough to be around this sort of thing and its exactly as you say. I too, am for conservation

[Surya pradha]

thanks a lot

[Shadows Ember]

This is very good. lovely write.

[Surya pradha]

thanks, hope you liked it.

[mani]

Very well written !!

[Surya pradha]

thanks a lot!