The past Haunts you

The past Haunts you

A Book by ♥SunkissAngel♥
"

A girl named Isabella,she was only six years old when her two year old brother drowned. Now twenty years later her younger brother is coming back for his revenge. Her life starts to fall apart.

"

© 2010 ♥SunkissAngel♥


Author's Note

♥SunkissAngel♥
Please enjoy the book. i will post a chapter once a week so hope u like it...

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Hmmm, the description is a little confusing, hun. The first sentence makes it seem like an accident and the second sentence makes the event seem like a murder. Drowning is such a slow form of dying, water forever covering the air one craves for and usually, it's always an accident or "intended accident". Did you mean to do that? Entice the reader by letting them know right away that the death of Isabella's brother was no accident? Be careful with that and make sure that's what you want to do.

My inferences is that the younger brother will come back to haunt the girl. Apparently, Isabella must've had something to do with it seeing how the plot and scorn is directed at Isabella.

My suggestion is that the preview should be revised. Because the first sentence seems redundant. The "girl" is "six years old". A six year old female child is a girl and it distants the reader a bit. It's in Isabella's point of view, so it wouldn't hurt to just say Isabella since the name is also connected to a feminity.

Otherwise, the plot sounds familiar, so I'll see if I like the ride.

Posted 10 Years Ago



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Added on April 20, 2010
Last Updated on October 28, 2010
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Author

♥SunkissAngel♥
♥SunkissAngel♥

Fort Drum, NY



About
Bonjour!! Hey every one you may know me but if not my name is samantha but i go by sam, Sunkiss, or Pepper sometimes. I am 15 years old and is currently in a wonderful relation ship. I have two si.. more..

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