The Heart Is A Well

Hearts are wells full of love and all its components. When you don't experience much love, your well is empty. Yet you try to give love to others from that well.

It sucks to have experienced

falling asleep with someone, 

I miss the feel

of hands running over my body

as if to memorize me,

I miss that peace

that seemed to fill an empty place, 

especially when looking upon his face,

eyes closed as he dozed.

I miss that warmth,

That ease.

And I fight myself every day,

Hearing that broken voice say

that it wasn't meant to be ,

It will never be.

There's no one to look at me,

the way I looked at him,

No one to treat me,

As sweetly as I treated him,

There never will,

'Cause I can't let anyone in, 

I can't ever win,

Because I had a heart deep within

that always wanted to give and give

from a well that could only give a sip,

But, my heart played Jesus for a bit

and made that sip into a lake

from which too many hands could take,

But, guess who ended up burned at the stake? 

ME!

Because my heart actually wanted to taste

the water from someone else's well,

But no one seemed to be able to tell,

And now my heart is just a shell,

Dehydrated and burnt to hell,

And what else can I do

but long to put it out of its misery?

All that hopefullness and happiness is history!

I dont want anything out of life anyway!

Do try to make me stay,

maybe you'll get another day,

But, honestly,

I hate it here.

I hate longing for someone to hold me dear and near to their heart.

I hate longing for senual touch without fear of losing trust.

I hate feeling that I have no real purpose.

All this writing for what?

I'm still no better than I was on depression day one.

In fact,

I'm much worse.

Author's Note

I've been off of here for awhile. It's not easy to use this site on a phone and my laptop has been kinda slow and crappy. Had a friend fix it so, I'm gonna try to update my page on all of the countless pieces I've been putting on my wattpad. Do check that out when you get a chance. This piece is brand new. Hope you like.