Champagne Raincoat

Champagne Raincoat

A Poem by duff
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Broken down time piece

Won't tell me which way

To go to solve the issue

This feeling is killing me

The pleasure trust fund

Motives puzzle me easy

Sweet tooth baby calling

The lost satellite stalling

With our love once again

These cut up lines a fine

Dust yourself off my dear

Green eyes have no fear

Of a champagne raincoat


© 2020 duff


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Featured Review

I love the way this storyline feels like a winding river that winds back on itself, like each curve is connected, but going in a very different direction. You have crafted some butt-kicking ideas here, not only a sign of your writing skill, but especially a sign of your intellect . . . "pleasure trust fund" . . . "Sweet tooth baby" . . . "Dust yourself off" & of course your off-the-charts title! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 2 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

duff

2 Months Ago

I really appreciate it Margie



Reviews

Love the use of metaphor here duff and your final three lines exceptionally good. Short write, lingering imagery. Well done.

Chris

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

duff

1 Month Ago

Awesome Chris. I'm happy you enjoyed it.
Christine Anne Shaw

1 Month Ago

I did and you are welcome :)
The structure of your writes - there are no pauses, punctuations or stanzas. It starts out and reads in one go. This lends very different way of reading, it can form various ways to understand the context and the underlying meanings. I like this style of writing, very well Duff. On the write as a whole - it comes off beautifully in a smooth flow essaying the a tale of love, lost and some nostalgia may be. The last few lines are a fab, they evoke brilliant images and meanings for the reader to lose themselves in.
"Dust yourself off my dear
Green eyes have no fear
Of a champagne raincoat"
Keep writing, keep sharing. Thank you.

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

duff

1 Month Ago

Thank you so much my friend. Im grateful for your time and thoughts. I enjoy your writing as well.
Abhilash Hegde

1 Month Ago

you're very welcome duff. Glad to know :)
I love this! It's very nicely written and flows together well.

'Dust yourself off my dear
Green eyes have no fear
Of a champagne raincoat'

I particularly like those lines alot. Keep writing!

Posted 2 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

duff

2 Months Ago

Thank you so much my friend!
When the raincoat comes off...it's slicker...when all that we have as show for that other person becomes a teardrop spent...
the eyes see the real...sooner or later.
and we need to be accepted for who we are.
brilliant metaphorical piece here, duff.
I got pleasantly lost within it.
j.

Posted 2 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

duff

2 Months Ago

Thank you Jacob
I love the way this storyline feels like a winding river that winds back on itself, like each curve is connected, but going in a very different direction. You have crafted some butt-kicking ideas here, not only a sign of your writing skill, but especially a sign of your intellect . . . "pleasure trust fund" . . . "Sweet tooth baby" . . . "Dust yourself off" & of course your off-the-charts title! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 2 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

duff

2 Months Ago

I really appreciate it Margie

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5 Reviews
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Added on September 14, 2020
Last Updated on September 28, 2020

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duff
duff

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