Autumn

I refuse to feel this

I will mourn the stone

not what lies beneath

I will not feel this

As the pain builds

with the days that increase

The force of my resistance

only adds to the ease of my breaking

I have hardly any leaves left to fall

as the rot of autumn fills the air

I walk belonging through this field of the dead

casting circles until my final resting place is found

Such wasted hope and faith

Even the strongest structures erode with time

Now I chase shadows in the ruins that remain

Haunted by the echoes of songs long since lost

I admit I am jealous

not of your love for him

but for that you are happy

and I am not the cause

No longer is it mine to witness

your rise, your falls, your touch, smile and laughter

Never mine again to make certain

you are happy in each and every moment of my sadness

But I will not feel this

I can neither afford or allow

I have no more leaves left to fall

as the rot of another autumn fills the air

Copyright 'The Human Voice' 2012

Reviews

[Lucy Morningstar &heart..]

That was beautiful! The third last stanza" I admit I am jealousnot of your love for himbut for that you are happyand I am not the cause "...I love it :D you are a fantastic poet

[asdarkeyesclose]

'I have hardly any leaves left to fall'

hugely emotional, your feelings, honest, deep sadness strung through the writing. i thought this was excellent.

[Mark Anthony Games (Human Voice)]

Thank you very much Ghost of Dawn, Never had the word 'excellent' aimed my way before so that means a lot to me in terms of confidence. :-)

[Stanley Wilson]

good work enjoyed it

[Mark Anthony Games (Human Voice)]

Thank you,