Too Much of Everything

It's too hot outside for a funeral.

People are sweating,

and tugging on their collars,

and fanning themselves with their hands.

I don't know who would plan a funeral

during a summer heat wave.

Everyone looks uncomfortable.

But not because it's a funeral and they're sad.

Because it's too hot.

There's too much sunlight.

It makes my eyes hurt

so I have to squint

every time I look up.

I want it to go away.

It's a funeral.

Sunlight is too happy

for something so sad.

There's too much black.

It's all around me.

It feels like I'm drowning in it.

I hate my black dress.

It's uncomfortable

in all this heat and sunlight.

I just want to go home and take it off.

There's too much crying.

Everyone around me is crying,

and wiping their eyes and noses,

and sniffling into their handkerchiefs.

I'm not crying at all.

I'm too close to the casket.

I don't like being able to see it

as they put her in the ground.

Her parents are right across from me.

They look at me every now and then.

I don't know if I should smile or nod or just look away.

I wonder what they think when they don't see

a single tear on my cheeks.

It's too much for me.

All this heat, and sunlight, and black, and crying.

It's unbearable.

I wish I could cry.

I want to.

Not crying makes me want to scream.

I want to tilt my head

up to the sky

and scream as loud as I can

until my throat is raw

and my voice is gone.

I'm too in shock though

to do anything but shake.

Reviews

[carol]

OMG, you nailed it, I could close my eyes and see and feel the scene. I love it. Great job, I am so impressed with you. You listened to everything we said, used it, yet kept the piece in the format you started with. Your imagery is right on. Keep up the good work, I can't wait to read more.

Carol

[Fenix Flight]

Really good. I like the new tweaks. Makes the story flow better. Still a fan :-D