My name. (Or the reason i hate doctors.)

My name. (Or the reason i hate doctors.)

A Story by Thomas Pynk

 My Name. (Or the the reason I hate doctors)

 
I Hate Doctors.
    But I have a reason, and a very good reason at that. Now before I tell you the story of why I have such a strong dislike of doctors, (other that the fact they treat you like a human pin cushion during flu season) I must tell you this story. Enjoy.
    Two or three months before I was born, my great aunt Charlotte passed away. As you could have guessed I never met her, but my mother and her were very attached. My mother had lived with Charlotte for quite a while when she was young and they had formed, over time, a very close bond. Charlotte, in a way, was like a second mother to my mother. Charlotte had children of her own (and quite a few at that, seven children throughout her lifetime) and my mother got along well with most of them, but that is another story.
    I have seen pictures of Charlotte, and read much of her poetry. She was a wonderful women, but she was sad, very sad. From the stories my grandma and my mother tell me, she was rather eccentric with constant mood swings. But she loved my mother as if she were her own child. I would have loved to of met her and felt obliged to mention her in warm tones. 
    Now that I have told you that story, I can explain my name and why I hate doctors.
One or two weeks before Charlotte died, my pregnant mother went in for an ultrasound. She wanted to know the sex of her soon to be born baby. The original plan that she had talked through with my father was that they would wait for me to be born and figure out the sex for themselves. (Not too difficult.) But my mother just could not wait one day longer so she went to the hospital to find out whether I was an Adam or an Eve. This is the part that explains why I loathe most doctors, very simply put. . . . .
 
They thought I was a girl.
    Yes. They thought I was a girl, female, woman! The quack. What you must know now is two things.
1: In the United States, after a certain period of time, a women can name her child before he or she is born.
2: The Mormon church has a very strange custom. They don’t care what stage of life you are in,  you can be baptized no matter what. There have been many stories of extreme Mormons digging up dead bodies to baptize them. This also works the other way around. You can be baptized into the Mormon faith before you are born.
    As i said before, my mother and my great aunt Charlotte were extremely close to each other and when she had heard the news that Charlotte had died, she absolutely went off the deep end and ran out of the house, got the proper forms and officially named me Charlotte. I was Charlotte D. Bertheaud.
I am Charlotte.
 

© 2009 Thomas Pynk


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Thats great! I love reading stories with this kind of humur!

Posted 10 Years Ago


Very clever piece! Very original and faced paced, and tight.
You are very skilled with words!

Posted 10 Years Ago


Oh wow I love that. its really funny I must say! I think it would be horrible to know you were a boy and named after a woman.

Posted 10 Years Ago



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Added on September 24, 2009
Last Updated on October 4, 2009


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