Hiding words

Rambling writings to fill the emptiness in my heart
Between witty sayings and clever rhymes hides my plea
Covered by sentimental thinking, disguised by romantical reasoning
False smiles and false laughs, a broken soul to shade
They do their job well

Reviews

[KurKota]

I connect with your making the simple statement ...the various uses of words often hide our deeper feelings we may have whether good or bad. They can either be used to express feelings or in a different usage, hide feelings. I think your simply stating this point, and not rambling on about it extensively ....helps emphasis your point ! Maybe you could refine the actual structure of it so it flowed a bit more, would be my only suggestion, but in its intent and entirety I think you did very well in stating your point. Good job.

[GhostlyAuthor]

Thank you.

[KurKota]

You are welcome !

[Tim]

Writing is a good way to fill up those empty feelings. Posting it here assures us that even if no one reviews at least someone read some of it and we were heard. Romantic lines never hurt anyone. Good poem.

[Wolfwind]

Ooo... I know about these type of hiding words. They work better than paper mache and plaster in making masks that hide the troubled waters beneath. Thanks for sharing your inklings, very much related too.

Aaron - Wolfwind

[GhostlyAuthor]

Thank you for reviewing

[Wolfwind]

You're welcome!

[Trigorin]

Nice piece, but I feel like you could have gone on and done a lot more than you did with this concept. Maybe consider expanding this in the future? Your writing style is fairly well-rounded, and you've avoided stale language very well, but I think you could have used more imagery and metaphor in this piece - it is poetry after all!
As it stands though, this isn't bad at all. Well done.

[GhostlyAuthor]

Thank you. I write on whims so I might continue it if I get more inspiration.