Change

Change

A Poem by KeelyJane

Dirty and disheveled

No shoes on his feet

Tired and famished

No food to eat

His pockets empty

His last penny spent

All that remains

A hole and some lint

All he owns in a basket

A box for a bed

A story written in a notebook

This is what it read:

"I was sixteen when I left

Nearly twenty two when I returned

My left arm completely gone

My right severely burned

I wasn't just a boy

I was so much more

I was a soldier

An asset to a war

I gave my all

I nearly gave my life

I survived the struggle

Now I struggle to survive

I was dealt a bad hand

The system had four aces

I went all in

And came out among the faceless faces"

As I finished reading

I thought it somewhat strange

For all that I owe this man

Why does he only ask for change?

© 2013 KeelyJane


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Featured Review

It is so sad that so many return vets and hero's end up on the street.
your last two lines were very powerful.

My older brother served in the Marines during Vietnam and I served in the army during a short period of peace this country has seen.

I thank you for this wonderful, thought provoking poem.
Well done.

Trace

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

This is a powerful piece, really hits you hard; at least it hit me.
It is crazy how society tends to blame the victim and this is a sort of nudge in the right direction.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

It is so sad that so many return vets and hero's end up on the street.
your last two lines were very powerful.

My older brother served in the Marines during Vietnam and I served in the army during a short period of peace this country has seen.

I thank you for this wonderful, thought provoking poem.
Well done.

Trace

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Nice one. I like it. I like the guy's msg. And I like the way you took the time to get it. And I like the brilliantly subtle msg in the title. Of course most never really notice and very few wld spot the msg in the guy's plea. Wld he even have got it?

Posted 7 Years Ago


"I survived the struggle
Now I struggle to survive".. this is the reality and its so true, even though the words are beautifully put together they bring me immense pain as I hate to see a veteran left out cold and hungry in the rain.
The concept of this piece was beautiful, when I read change I thought it was going to be about making a change or something along that perspective but this was an awakening read and definitely one I hope everyone on the cafe reads, loved it. Favorited.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Wow, how heart rending. Why do we treat our vets this way? Great read Keely.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

These people who go to war and put their lives on the line for us all should be honoured and not thrown away after all that they have done.Well said .

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

One of the best poems about soldiers I've read on this site. Surely their sacrifice is indescribably heroic and they deserve more than we give them credit for. An enlightening and emotional poem. And the last line is "wow". You ended it very well. Lovely poem!

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is beautifully penned, KeelyJane.. the flow and rhyme are lovely, the theme sad and unfortunately happening more each day.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

this is a pretty amazing write. That last line hits the reader right between the eyes.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I am liking this piece that you have penned as I can identify. I do have some critique about one line that broke your wonderful flow of your prose. And came out among the faceless faces'.

Posted 7 Years Ago



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Added on February 18, 2013
Last Updated on February 19, 2013

Author

KeelyJane
KeelyJane

Albuquerque, NM



About
I'm just a girl with a lifetime of experiences. I've taken from those experiences what can be put into words and poetically put them together to share with all of you. These are my contributions. .. more..

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