Chapter XXVI

A Chapter by Calypso

January’s days could be counted in the lack of things she did. Reading cheesy books and playing ‘Go Fish’ with the crazy patients didn’t really count as actives.

January did what she was told day in and day out. Ate when she was told, talked to the doctors when it was commanded to, and was quick to bed and quick to rise.

After a week her mother visited. Lily told her she was going downstairs for an ultrasound.

While still wearing the clothes prescribed for her she followed her mother to the maternity ward.

When her name was called to see the doctor she and Lily followed the nurse into a dark room.

January was told to pull up her gown until all of her stomach was exposed. After that she lied down on a bed and the nurse applied gobs of something that felt like aloe vera.

Lily sat behind a curtain for January’s sake.

“The child is growing well. It looks healthy.” The woman paused. “Would you like to know the sex?”

From the beginning January had turned her face way from the screen and towards the ceiling. She was afraid that looking at the screen would cause something crazy to happen. Maybe the child would speak and tell her how much it hated her for almost aborting it; maybe the child would be a freak after the glass of wine on Christmas or the seafood she ate on Fridays.

Again the technician said, “Would you like to know the sex?”

Lily said, “No”

January was relived that Lily had answered for her.

“Is that what you want?”

“Yes.” January whispered.

“As of so far, the child looks like it will be due around June 30. You can always give or take.”

At that moment January wanted a hand to hold. The father of the child (had she not been raped) would have been nice, but her mother would have to be second best.

In the dark of the room January could hear her child. On the monitor it’s heart was beating in a smooth, but quick fashion.

“It’s heart…” She commented weakly.

The technician shook her head as if was nothing to worry about. “It’s normal.”

“How big is it?” Lily yelled behind the curtain.

They could hear her very clearly behind it, but the nurse ignored that and said, “It should be 2 pounds and 14 inches long.”

During the rest of the examination January listened more closely to her child. The heartbeats weren’t the only way she could hear it.

The child was making sounds that she could feel inside of her. Day and night it danced in it’s womb.

Once the nurse had finished up with January Lily next took her to the office of the OBGYN.

Luckily for January the doctor was female. On TV she had watched women put their feet up in high up stirrups and only a blanket on their stomach for modesty’s sake.

The OBGYN looked educated and patient, almost kind but when she asked January to take off her underwear and put her feet in the stirrups she felt panicky.

Lily had to hold her up as she took off her underwear because she was acting like a cow about to be tipped.

Even OBGYN came out of her seat to help January.

By the time they were off January could feel her chest tighten.

Grabbing on to her shirt she tried to gather air. Invisible hands were tightening around her throat. She felt like she was going to die, or at least pass out.

“What’s wrong Miss Rossi?”

With a motherly (yet offended voice) Lily answered. “She’s a trauma victim.”

The doctor placed her hands on January’s shoulders and urged her to come back to her body. As January’s breathing returned to normal the doctor reminded her that she was in a safe place, where she would never be hurt.

Between the doctor and Lily they were able to get January up and onto the cot.

Whispering kind words only help January so much. It the doctor could have stopped the examination right then and there January could have gone though her day in peace.

Yes Lily and the OBGYN were right about her needing to be checked out, but the hadn’t been there when it happened. There was no way they could ever fell the pain she felt during the attack.

A poke there, a probe there, that was all January ever felt. Given the time of time she felt hungry and weak. The whole time had been a uphill battle.

“She looks good so far. How are you Miss Rossi?”

January couldn’t really speak so she nodded her head.

After leaving the room Lily told January to sit down.

Lily looked over her shoulder both way and pulled out her cell phone, despite the posters with huge crossed out cell phones on the wall.

“Mr. Kay? Hello this is Lily Masters. No, my husband couldn’t have called.” Pause. “Amadeo Rossi is my ex-husband, not husband. And well, January’s biological father.” Pause “Really? That’s a surprise.” Pause. “But there was a reason I called. It’s January. Ya, she saw the OBGYN and the ultrasound technician. They both said she’s healthy and so is the baby.” Pause…pause “It’s due in June.”

“Mom, what’s going on?” January tried to ask but Lily shushed her.

“Really, that fast?” Lily looked truly shocked and then relief spread over her face. “Great I’ll tell her. Thanks. Ya you can meet up with her. You have to go though a process to get into the Psych ward at the hospital.” Pause. “I’ll let the doctor’s know you’re her attorney.”

Lily closed her cell phone, smiled and said, “I have good news.”

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