A Love That Could Never Be

A Love That Could Never Be

A Poem by RJ620Win

Is it wrong to love you if you’re so far away?
To wish to hold you and ask if you’re okay?
When I call and you’re not there, it hurts,
I wonder if this relationship will work.
Day after day I picture your beautiful face,
and feel inspired to go on in the chase.
I love you so much, so much till I cry,
on the phone I hear your saddened sigh.
What do you see in me? You ask.
This is a love that could never be.
I’m here and you’re there, and your family hates me,
stop calling. Its over. Just live without me.
I cry and cry, day after day, night after night,
hoping and praying that you may change your mind.

© 2010 RJ620Win


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Featured Review

i have always maintained that complicated words and phrases aren't required to portray one's emotions and your write is another befitting example of that . simple words used as a means to bring out emotions from the core . the pain , the anguish and all the related feelings ~~ i know , i relate to and empathize cause i have and am going through the same . how we wish that they change their mind ... sighs..

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

I liked this poem, but some of it needs a little work. The last line is good, but it doesn't really rhyme with the one before that, so the poem's structure isn't entirely uniform. Everyone is pretty much guilty of that at some point (I definitely am >.

Posted 8 Years Ago


I liked this poem very much...
Technically...you've chosen to rhyme...
Rhymimg is like a jealous mistress...
once you decide to take her, you better not ignore her
whatever rhyming scheme you pick, you have to be faithful to it...
I loved the sentiments...

Posted 8 Years Ago


That's so emotional.
I love this kind of poems o.o
Great one !

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Sad and telling write. Caught between emotion and what is, never an easy choice.

Posted 9 Years Ago


wow so sad and emotional

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I can relate to this so much. I've had a few online relationships myself so I can see how that might hurt. The rhyming scheme is off but that's okay. A job well done.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

nicely done.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Long distance love, Great description of it's grip on all parties.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I really like this poem.
It has a lot of meaning! (:
Distance in any kind of relationship hurts.
Great job!!!

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This also goes along with the feeling of someone you care for only, loving you as a friend, i can realate to this one for sure, this opens hearts and minds all togethor, i believe the morve we love the stronger we get, to relized what is tre love.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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24 Reviews
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Added on September 6, 2010
Last Updated on September 6, 2010

Author

RJ620Win
RJ620Win

Dipolog City, region IX, Philippines



About
I am no one....nothing special; just a common guy with common thoughts and principles. I've lived and led a common life but remarkable. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be .. more..

Writing
HOW I WISH HOW I WISH

A Poem by RJ620Win



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