The Mask Of Jealousy

Narrative essay written for class. It received an "A".

             “Hi, what’s your name?” asked a peppy voice from behind me. At this point I didn’t know, but that voice belonged to a girl who I would grow very close to over the next few months. It was also the voice of the girl who would expose herself as a jealous person when acquiring a boyfriend became the topic of interest.  It was this friendship that would become a major milestone of growing up; a lesson that would teach me ‘not everyone is what they originally seem to be’ was about to unfold.

              I smiled back at her, with the reply then followed up with "What’s yours?” She looked up at me, “I’m Jessica, may I join your group?” came the reply. Jessica and I, as well as about twenty five other teenagers were all new members of the youth program at Lowry Park Zoo called “ECCO”. It was the beginning of July, and the first day of the program. Our supervisor had instructed us to get into groups of three and begin our ‘break the ice’ exercises. Of course, I happily accepted Jessica as a member of my group.

              When the time September rolled around, Jessica and I had formed a close bond through the common interests we shared. Any personal favorites, from animals to jokes, were mutual between us. This was around the time we had also learned we would both be attending Chamberlain High School as freshmen. It was a relief to both of us that we would have each other’s backs as we plunged into our first day of high school.

              The evening after the first day of school, Jessica contacted me to get the details of my schedule. After I read my schedule aloud, reciting all the teachers and room numbers accordingly, she responded, “That puts us at having zero classes together.” I reassured her that we would still be able to hang out after school once in a while, and that seemed to cheer her up. I was elated that I could improve her mood so quickly with so few words.                                                                             

             Over the next few months, it became apparent to me that Jessica had her mind set on getting into a relationship. Whenever I’d go over to her house after school she’d busy herself with her cell phone, text messaging flirtatiously with several boys at a time. This behavior was slightly foreign to me considering I was not the most outgoing individual, by nature. I admired her confidence and hoped I’d be able to be just as sure of myself one day.                                                                                                                                                          Then, one day in the middle of January, I was sitting in my second period class when someone behind me called my name. “Pssst!” sounded the voice. I turned around to the face of a guy with dark, curly hair and bronze skin grinning widely at me. “Do you know Jessica, by any chance?” he asked casually. “Yes, I do” I replied, “She’s my best friend.” Our teacher then quieted us both, declaring our brief conversation over.

               I brought up the strange encounter to Jessica later that day, after school. She immediately jumped to life and dished out questions. “What did he look like? What did he say?” she probed. I described him and recited the two sentence conversation that had taken place. Her facial expression then turned into one of boredom. “Oh, that’s Richie” she sighed listlessly. I questioned her sudden disinterest in the event, and she informed me she liked him once, but there were no feelings for him any more.

              Thinking nothing more, I went to second period the next day to find Richie now sitting in the desk right behind mine. This became a routine over the next two weeks, and despite our close seating arrangement few words were exchanged during class between us.

              Then on the Saturday of February 13^th, while Jessica and I spent the day at the State Fair, she broke the news to me, “Richie really likes you.” I stopped walking for a moment. I couldn’t understand how, we’d barely spoken. Jessica apparently sensed my confusion and added, “He wants to get to know you a little better.” I stayed silent for a moment, pondering how this would work if my best friend used to have a ‘thing’ for this guy. “Well….?” She prompted, with a coy undertone to her voice. I hesitantly agreed, but assured her I would give it a shot.

               Throughout the entire week of school after the breaking news, I updated Jessica daily; as she insisted on hearing every juicy detail between us. That Friday, I was able to message her back that it was now official between Richie and myself. She replied immediately, “I’m so happy for you guys!” I beamed at the text message; it was great to know she was so supportive of my first relationship.

                  Things progressed smoothly between us for about a month.  Every morning, he’d show up to my locker to spend time with me before the first bell. However, one morning, Richie didn’t show up at my locker to meet me.  He was absent from my locker the following morning, and then the morning after that. I messaged Jessica to ask her what I should do.  She instructed me to come over after school and I nervously agreed to do so.

                When we arrived at her house that afternoon, she informed me of exactly what I had suspected; Richie no longer had feelings for me. She added that he was hesitant to tell me because he didn’t want to be the one to hurt me. Tears began to form in my eyes and my jaws uncomfortably clenched together. “Hurt me? How could it save me pain by receiving this information through a third party?!” I thought. Angrily, I messaged him to finalize the break up.

                That evening he responded, “What are you talking about? I still care about you.” I faltered, and then messaged back explaining to him what Jessica had told to me earlier that day. He denied the conversation I repeated to him, then claimed Jessica had told him that I was the one who no longer had feelings for him, but was afraid to let him know. That was the reason he stopped meeting me at my locker. My head began to spin with the questions “Why would Jessica do this?” and “Why would she make all this up?” I thought she was my best friend.

                 I called Jessica, questioning her and she admitted to what she had done. Then, Jessica’s personality shifted after the accusations were laid out. She began to yell at me with a nasty edge to her voice, accusing me of stealing boys from her. My heart pounded as I picked up on the aggression in her voice, as I couldn’t even grasp the situation at first. Then it dawned on me. This wasn’t the same girl who I’d grown close to over the last few months; this wasn’t the girl who was supportive of my relationship just one month ago. This furiously jealous person was her true identity and everything else had been a lie.

               After that night I never spoke to Jessica again. She wasn’t the caring and supportive friend she made herself out to be. In reality Jessica was a conniving and controlling individual that couldn’t bear to see someone else happier than herself. At that point, the lesson of trust was learned. Like Jessica, anyone could be ‘wearing a mask’, fooling you to believe they are someone other than they really are.