DEPARTED

Though she never showed still i felt the pain 

And i cry for the reason i can never feel her again 
I know i cant sit with the pain, i have to move on 
But i still see her image in dark light of dawn
Its hard to be believe that really she is gone
And she left me with this pain to face it all alone
No matter how much i try, i cant wash all that stain
But there is one thing i can do , hope and pray for the rain 

Your body left me but soul never parted
And yes for the world you may have departed  

Reviews

[dunnia]

this is beautiful..i live the sadness it gives off

[Summer D.]

A quick grammar fix up and proper capitalization here and there is needed. Just the formatting overall needs to be fixed. Sad poem; It was alright.

"And i cry for the reason i can never feel her again." For some reason this line just stood out to me. It somewhat interrupted the flow? Maybe you could choose another wording?

"No matter how much i try, i cant wash all that stain
But there is one thing i can do , hope and pray for the rain."

My favorites lines but it is in need of a revision.
" I can't wash the stain."

Not " all that stain". If you wanted to speak of more than one stain.. try..
" all those stains."

[~Dragon X]

Oh how sad :( It is filled with emotion and keeps the reader drowned with feelings. Keep it up! :D

[Harmonica winds]

Aw this is so heart tugging and sad. Awesome rhyme and flow.

[AMP]

Awww... This is so sad, and yet, it has a happy ending. It has hope. Beautiful.

[Dupree]

Amazing poem I love this.

[EMMIE]

Those last two lines are so deep! Great write!

[Irfan Bashir Shah]

I Can feel the pain and the strong voice that you are trying to raise in your poetry.
its raw and straight from the gut....
too Good!