Chapter 4

"You're a freaking Lesbian and you didn't tell me?!" I asked, casually talking to Nicole later that night.

 

"Bisexual, excuse you, and about that..." She started, not seeming to impressed with how I was handling the situation.

 

"And you were dating Kaila for how many months until I found out?" I was upset, I felt like I'd been lied to for no good reason. "You know this hurts... a lot!"

 

"James, I wanted to tell you, I really did. But Kaila told me that if I said anything to you she'd break up with me. Her mom works with your mom at the office, and if her mom found out and told her dad, he would beat her. It took me this long to convince her to finally let me tell you. I told her to come meet you so she could see that she can trust you." She said in defense.

 

"And I wanted to tell you that I was bisexual, but I was afraid it would raise questions of how I know and why I feel like this. And I couldn't tell you about Kaila and... and... James I'm so sorry I d-d-didn't t-tell you! I feel like such a s****y friend!" She started sobbing over the phone. Which made me feel horrible and regret even bringing the topic up.

 

"Nicole, it's ok. I must say, this is better news then telling me you're pregnant. At least now I won't have to be a god father." I said, trying to be funny. "Now when you bring me that news you and I are going to have to have a long talk with questions of how, when, why, how long, with who, and how long. If you know what I mean!" This got her laughing.

 

"Yeah, well don't worry, I think you have a better chance of gettin' any before I do. I mean come on! I'm dating a girl! I know what a b***h girls can be and how conservative we are of our bodies, and still I have fantasies of having sex with her..." She said, not know how grossed out I was getting.

"How... what would... OMG! Never mind!" I said, trying to push the images out of my head. "I can't believe you're telling me this! That's totally disgusting!"

 

"Oh shove it! It's not like you don't have those kinds of dreams too! It's just you dream about the perverted pics of guys you find having sex online! And you do more then just dream it, you're right hand gets in on it too!" She said, I've never heard her talk so dirty...

 

"How do you know I use my right hand?" I asked, a bit amazed and scared at the same time.

 

"When you squeeze your fists, your right arm has a higher bulge then the left. And being that I know you don't lift weights, that muscle had to come from somewhere." She said matter-of-factly.

 

"Ugh! What about you? Since you seem to be the master of masterbation, do you jack off... or... whatever it is you would do?" I asked out of curiosity.

 

"Well, we're getting personal here, aren't we? Truthfully, I don't. I tried it once, but it felt so wrong I couldn't do it again. I don't know, some girls do it, and nothing's wrong with it, but it just doesn't seem like it's for me." Wow, someone who doesn't jack off. After the first day of gym, I didn't think I'd ever know someone like that.

 

"Ok, well before we get anymore personal I'm changing the subject. Tell me about Kaila." I demanded.

 

"Oh my god, Jay, she is amazing! First of all, she can be very shy. But when I get her alone she is wild! And before you ask, I am still a virgin... All over!" She said quickly adding the last sentence, "And I love her hair. It feels great to be able to run my hands through someone else's hair while I hold them tight. Oh Jay, she is amazing! I wish you knew how much I like her."

 

"Wow, I can guess. Now I want to tell you about Christain really quick. He is amazing too! He kissed me before I left today! Like total tongue action... it was sexy! I actually had a bit of trouble walking away from that one, I was in need of a lower adjustment!" I said, seeing if she could catch my reference.

 

"I totally know what you mean! If I had a thingy too I would raise a flag when Kaila and I kiss!" Well I guess that means she got it! "Jay, I think I'm in love with Kaila. And I want to say she feels the same way about me, but I don't know, I'm afraid to say it first!" She said.

 

"Well... take a chance and say it. You know how you're going to feel if she says she's not ready, and you know how you're going to feel if you don't say it. So which one is worse?" I asked, trying to be a love coach, ha! I have no experience, but it sounded good to me.

 

"Hm, I don't know. Do you really think I should tell her? You don't think it'll be too early?" She asked, sounding genuinely confused.

 

"To tell you the truth, Nicole, I have no clue. If you feel like you should do it, then do it! Or else you'll only regret it!"

 

"Ok, I'm going to do it! I'm going to talk to her tomorrow afternoon when we meet at the warehouse, and I'll tell her." She said, convincingly.

 

"So what about this warehouse?" I asked.

 

"Every day we can, we meet at the old warehouse on 6th street. That way neither of our parents find out. That's why you can't ever get ahold on me until five after school. That's where I am. I know you thought I was just doing my homework, but nope. That's where I am. But please don't ask anymore questions about it. It's sort of a privet matter." She responded.

 

"Okie-dokie, I'll cool with that too. I'm going to get off here so I can take a shower and think over my day! I'll talk to you later... and don't worry, I wont tell my mom about Kaila."

 

"Thank's, good night! Oh, and one more thing, don't let your hand get too excited while you're thinking about your day. He's not your boyfriend yet... you've still got work to do!" She said and then hung up.

 

I hung up the phone and looked at the ceiling. He kissed me today! And his tongue slipped in between my lips, and it touched my tongue! Oh my, it was A-M-A-Zing!

 

I kept thinking about the kiss and eventually fell asleep. Totally forgetting to shower.

--

"James! Get up! You're going to be late for school!" My mom yelled making me jump out of bed and fall into my laundry hamper.

 

"Wha-Wha-What time is it?!" I yelled back.

 

"It's six-forty." She said as she walked away

 

That means I have half an hour until I need to leave. I raced down the hall to the bathroom and quickly jumped into the freezing shower. I took a quick shower, but still taking time to carefully select my products: Mane and Tail and something different. I grabbed the bar of Dove cucumber moisturizing soap. It felt so good, and smelled pretty good too! When I got out of the shower I looked at the clock, I had twelve minutes left. I dried my hair and ran a bit of gel through it, giving it that "I just got out of bed but I'm clean" look. When I got to my room I grabbed a pair of light jeans and threw on a white tee-shirt and a button up blue and white long-sleeve. I raced back to the bathroom to fix my hair, and then back to my room to put my shoes on. I practically fell down the stairs and grabbed two pieces of bread and husseled back upstairs. When I had eaten the bread, I brushed my teeth and looked at the clock. I still had forty-five seconds until I needed to leave. Man I'm good!

 

When I reached the school I found Nicole and Caleb talking over by the small maple tree. I walked over and sat at their feet.

 

"So how's GQ?" Caleb asked, with a hint of humor in his eye.

 

"I'm fine, how's pinkie boy?" I returned.

 

"Ah! Why do you guys always bring that up? I was little!" He said in defense.

 

"You were eleven!" Nicole said, starting to laugh.

 

"Whatever, so Jay Bird here has a boyfriend? What's up with this sickness?" He asked with his usual totally-straight attitude. Nicole turned to Caleb and fired.

 

"Suck it Caleb! I swear if you don't start thinking before you speak I'm going to beat the s**t out of you one day!"

 

Caleb and I both looked at her in aw. I'd heard her cuss before, and last night we talked about  masturbation, but never had I heard her threaten to beat anyone up, especially to that degree. Man, she must be riding her little red dot! I looked at Caleb and raised an eyebrow to enforce her warning.

 

"Fine, whatever. I'm sorry for being such a Phobe. It's just weird for me ask my best guy friend about his boyfriend. I mean, come on, It'd be the same way if I had to ask you about your girlfriend. But I don't, because you're like the only normal one here." He said, totally unaware of the sudden change in emotion on Nicole's face.

 

I couldn't tell if she was ready to tell him or not, but I realized that if I didn't change the subject quick, there was going to be a big problem between them. I looked around the school yard and found a new topic.

 

"Oh my god! Guys look over by the far tree!" I said, forcing both of them to look. I couldn't believe what I was seeing.

 

"Is that... Gerrard?" Nicole asked, her jaw dropping.

 

"Yeah, that's him." Caleb said, a big grin spreading across his face.

 

He was sitting at the base of the farthest tree on school grounds. His face was almost entirely black, and there were large welts on his arms. People must have noticed him because there was no one within thirty feet of him.

 

"What do you think happened?" I asked, a little scared for him. I hope it wasn't what I was thinking.

 

"Well what ever it was, he deserved it!" Caleb said.

 

"Ugh! Caleb you are a freaking jerk! It looks like someone beat him! God, how does he deserve that? How would you feel if someone beat you with a belt?" Her face was ice cold as she turned to me and said, "Lets go, I know you hate him, but get over it. He needs someone to talk to."

 

She pulled me towards Gerrard and I pulled away, turning her around to face me.

 

"Nicole, you should know something before we go over there. He's gay or bisexual, one of the two. I saw him with a guy Saturday. I just wanted you to know that." I said.

 

"Yeah, and?" She said, looking at me like I was stupid. "What does that matter? He's still a person in need of help. Whether or not he's a hypocrite."

 

She grabbed my arm and pulled me towards him again, I pulled my arm out of her grip and walked along side her. When we reached him he looked up from his lap, tears streaming down his face. I started to really feel bad for him. Nicole sat down in front of him, and I remained standing. That is until she pulled my pants and I was forced to sit down or show the world my other half.

 

We sat there for a couple of minutes, with no one saying anything, until Gerrard looked up at me and asked, "So are you going to rub it in or what?"

 

I had no way to respond to that, but luckally Nicole jumped right in.

 

"No we're not here to hurt you, we want to help. If you want to talk to us you can. Or if you want us to leave we can do that too." She said. Looking him straight in the eye.

 

"Why? Why would you guys want to help me? Especially you James, I've made your life a living hell!" He said, turning to me. Nicole couldn't answer this for me. I had to do it. I took a breath and began.

 

"Because, Gerrard, I know what it's like to be gay. And I know how it feels when you can't tell anyone about who you are and how you feel all the time. And I don't think anyone should have to feel that way, even you." I said, surprised at how easily it came out.

 

"Well I'm not gay... I'm... bisexual." He said, almost scared to say it aloud.

 

"Either way, I know how you feel." I said.

 

"And so do I." Nicole added, "I'm bisexual too. And you better feel privileged to know, because Jay just found out yesterday, and here I'm telling you today." I nodded in agreement.

 

"Well... you guys don't have to do this. I'll be fine by myself. I don't need protection or whatever." He said, looking confused.

 

"We're not here for protection. We're here for you to talk to us. But if say the word, we'll leave." I said.

"No don't leave. I want someone to talk to." As he said this the bell rang for us to go inside.

 

"Ok," Nicole started, "Here's what we'll do. We'll wait for everyone to get inside and then we'll go to the office and ask Mrs. Goldsburg if we can use the meeting room to talk. I'm sure she'll agree, and she'll excuse us all from out first class."

 

"Fine, but I don't want her in the room. I'm not ready to talk to her yet." He said. Looking ashamed.

"Ok, but can I talk to you for a second?" I asked, turing to Nicole.

 

We walked to the nearest tree and I reminded her that Mrs. Goldsburg will have to take a report on Gerrards injuries.

 

"I know, and so does he. He wouldn't have come to school if he hadn't." She said, matter-of-factly. We walked back over to Gerrard and headed into the building. As we were walking I noticed that Gerrard had a limp in his left leg.

 

We walked into the guidance office and Nicole spoke to Mrs. Goldsburg while Gerrard and I sat in the waiting area. They walked out to us and Mrs. Goldsburg pursed her lips and looked at Nicole with a very serious stare. Nicole nodded and lead us to the meeting room and shut the door.

 

"Ok, here's the deal. Mrs. Goldsburg needs a report on your injuries. You have two options. You can either let her take the report and get it over with, or she will have to call the police to take the report and a statement." Nicole said, giving Gerrard a questioning look. "It's up to you. But there has to be a report either way."

 

"Ugh! She can take the damn report after we talk!" He said, growing angry. It's obvious he knew there would be a report.

 

"Ok, so what happened?" Nicole asked.

 

Gerrard took a deep breath and began, "Yesterday I came home from visiting my... um... boyfriend. And my dad was drinking at the kitchen table. He asked me where I'd been and I told him I was riding my bike with some friends. He screamed, 'Bull S**t! You were f*****g your f****t friend, weren't you?!' I... I'd forgotten to close my email window before I raced out of the house to meet him. So my dad saw it when he went to get my laundry. He also searched through my history and found porn sites I'd forgotten to delete. So he found out I'm bi, except he thinks I'm totally gay. So he started yelling at me and I just froze. I didn't try to deny it, and I didn't say anything in response to his questions. He was pissed and drunk. He got up from the table and pushed me into the fridge, and then he took off his belt and... and--"

 

"Gerrard, I'm so sorry." Nicole said, with tears in her eyes.

 

While he was talking I'd been leaning up against the far wall, trying to look far stronger then I felt. But when he started to sob I sat down and softened my face.

 

"When h-he was done he went into my room and g-g-grabbed my book bag. He threw it at me and told me to get my a*s out o-of his house. He doesn't ever want to see me again. I...I stood up and tried to ask him if he was serious but he punched me." Gerrard said, motioning to his swollen left eye.

 

"Um... Gerrard. If you don't mind me asking, um, what happened to your leg?" I asked, a little curious of his limp.

 

He shook his head and closed his eyes. "When someone is beating you, your first instinct is to get away." He said, slowly, breathing hard. "But you can't get away if someone puts their size thirteen work boot on your foot and forces it down the wrong way."

 

"Oh... Gerrard!" Nicole said, getting up and giving him a hug. She seemed to be very experienced at this, she was careful where she put her hands and how hard she hugged.

 

I sat there looking down at the table. I just couldn't imagine my dad taking off his belt to me because I was gay. Yeah, I've been spanked before. Sometimes it was even with a belt, but nothing like this. Even if he did, my mom wouldn't let him kick me out. She'd come looking for me.

 

"Gerrard, what is your mom--"

 

"Jay, she passed away two years ago." Nicole said, giving me a weary look. How does she know this and I don't?

 

After a moment of silence Nicole released Gerrard and took a deep breath. "We have a couple of options. If you're willing to work with the two of us we'll help you get back on your feet." Nicole said, looking at me with a questioning glance. "Right?"

 

"Yeah. You just have to deal with a f*g and dyke for a little while." I said, trying to lighten the mood.

 

Gerrard looked up at Nicole and then me. "I have to ask you again, why are you helping me?"

 

"Because you deserve people who care about you in your life." Nicole said.

 

"Well I'm doing it for something else too, this way you'll never be able to mess with me again!" I said, "But of course I want to help because it's the right thing to do, also."

 

After we finished talking Nicole and I left the room so Mrs. Goldsburg could do her report. I asked her what we're going to do to help him and she turned to me with a very serious expression on her face.

 

"James, I need you to do something very benevolent. I need you to ask your parents if Gerrard can use your spare bedroom for a week." She said, giving me a solid stare.

 

"Oh is that all? I thought it's be something weird like asking my parents if my only enemy could live in my house for a week!" I practically yelled.

 

"James Daniel Mikelson! This is not about you! I'd ask my parents, but as you know, they are freaking homophobes! As for your parents, they're just looking for someone to help. Please Jay, do this for me." She said, giving me puppy dog eyes.

 

"Fine! But if he does anything weird I'm leaving him on your doorstep!" I said. Man this is going to be weird.

 

"While he is at your house, I'm going to see what will happen once his dad goes to jail. Most likely he'll go to a JDC because of his records, but if I can get it worked out with a judge, I'll get him into a group home until a family member can take him." She said, thinking like fifteen steps ahead. "But as for right now, he's going to have to go to the hospital and then give a police report. Mrs. Goldsburg said she'll tell us about what's happening during our lunch. But we have to go to class now. She left passes at the front desk for us."

--

"So he's gay, his dad disowned him, and he needs a place to stay?" My mom asked.

 

"Yes... pretty much." I replied.

 

"Is he going to see a councilor? And what's going to happen when he goes to court? Who's going to be his lawyer?" My dad asked, getting a furrow in his brow.

 

"Um, I don't know, I don't know, and... I don't know? I'm just trying to get him a place to stay." Not that it was my idea, but I'll take the credit for it right about now.

 

"Well let's go to the police department and pick him up. It'll take us a little while to fill out the paper work." My mom said grabbing her coat. She's a sector supervisor for our counties children services department, so she knows exactly what's going to happen.

 

We got in our mini van and headed down town. When we got there Nicole was sitting in the waiting area and jumped up when she saw us.

 

"Mr. and Mrs. Mikelson, thank you soooooo much for helping! I'm sorry for such the short notice, but he needs a place to stay or else he'll spend the next couple of days in here." She said, giving each of us a hug.

 

"Oh honny, don't worry about it. We're always looking for someone to help." My mom said.

 

My mom went up to the desk and spoke to the receptionist. After a moment she was led back into the offices and dad followed, leaving Nicole and I in the waiting area.

 

"Thank you for doing this. I know you don't want too, but he needs your help." She said, smiling at me.

"Yeah I know. So how did the rest of school go for you?" I asked.

 

"Eh... it was long. First of all, I wanted to talk to Gerrard more. And secondly, no one would leave me alone. It's like suddenly everyone cares, and they're all worried about him."

 

"Yeah, but none of them were willing to step up and see what was wrong this morning. People make me sick sometimes." I said, not realizing what a hypocrite I was. Even I hadn't wanted to see what was wrong. Nicole just giggled at the irony.

 

"So are you going to call Christain when you get home?" She questioned, pain edging her face.

 

"Nicole! You didn't go see Kaila!" I said, just now remembering her pledge of love that was supposed to happen two hours ago.

 

"Yeah, she's going to be upset. I've never stood her up." She said, looking down at her feet. "I'm going to call her when I get home. I hope she answers."

 

"I'm sure she'll understand. I mean you were helping someone who needed it." I said.

 

"Yeah, but I could have taken two minutes to call her and tell her so she wasn't sitting alone in that warehouse for two hours. She can't just go home because her parents think she's practicing her cello, taking voice lessons, and tutoring kids througout the week until five. She set that all up, but stopped going when we met. I told her not to, but she wouldn't listen. She wants to spend every day with me." She said, still staring at her feet.

 

"Well it's not like she's going to break up with you over it. She might get upset, but she'll get over it. Right?" I suggested.

 

"Yeah, I guess... Come on lets go get a candy bar from across the street!"

 

We walked across the street to the convince store and picked out a candy bar each. Her uncle is the owner so he let us have them for free. We walked up and down paint street for about twenty minutes until Nicole's phone rang. She answered it and then handed it to me.

 

"Ces't ta mere." She said, in her perfect french accent.

 

"'Ello!" I said in a horrible English imitation.

 

"James, where are you? We're ready to go, lets go!" My mom said.

Reviews

[ssgliberty]

aw i feel sorry for gerrard people can be so mean. you did a good job so far.

[Eidolon Michael]

Awww poor Gerrard...humans are...so cruel. Your story is so realistic in the sense that it seems to focus on real-life matters. It's very good and I'm looking forward to reading more. Good work!