The Sun Still Rises

His skin, a canvas, painted in places he's loved
Where he remembers the sun. Asks now,
Where has it gone? He's cold.
Could not, will not
Break the ice.

Now, watching the sun,
Rise like a warning,
Washes over the town but the warmth
Does not, will not
Wash over him.

Suburbia yellowed in morning light,
He shuts his eyes. Never sleeps, always
Dreams.
Of destruction,
Of buildings burning,
Of cars crashing,
Of girls too far gone to give a damn.
Means well,
In a world void of meaning.

The sun climbs the sky with illuminated arms
Shining onto streets filled with innocence and ignorance.
He can see the night in all it's splendor,
Knows each star by its name,
Understands the darkness' plight,
But cannot, will not
See the light.

I know without asking--
I am night, I am Chamomile tea,
I am late night TV, and shots of whiskey.
I am half-read books, a slow moving clock,
And wasted time that never stops.

He is cold, feels alone,
Misses the place palm trees grow.
But oh, look at what the night can teach
Do not forget, will not forget,
The sun still rises,
Just as much as it sets.

Reviews

[.R.P.]

I really liked this a lot. Pregnant with metaphors and you had subtle rhyme controlling the tone and delighting me all the way up until the term "plight". I call Superfluous, don't need it, to end on "darkness" implies plight certainly and at the same time leaves the line wide open to interpretation; once we write a poem its no longer ours, it belongs to the audience and they will do with it what they will. I know you may want to keep a scheme to rhyme with "light" later in that stanza but you have such a liberal painting and processing of your syntax you may as well just let it be easy and breezing as sometimes form is art and other times form kills art. Really enjoyed this!!!!

[bob, small b. aka invs]

this is beautifully written. it shows, not only a positive spin in the hope of the rising sun, it shows a real understanding of the night. we need both, but a little balance is nice.

[Christie]

Thank you so much for your appreciation, your compliments, and for taking the time to read and digest my work. The night is something I've been thinking deeply about since I was a little kid, and I've always been somewhat of an insomniac, but hey, that's okay with me, cause there's no better time to write than through the quiet night. :-)

[zainul]

The poem sounds like a song of hope for your friend.
I can hear a sense of optimism from the following stanza.

"He is cold, feels alone,
Misses the place palm trees grow.
But oh, look at what the night can teach
Do not forget, will not forget,
The sun still rises,
Just as much as it sets."
Lovely work.

[Christie]

It was certainly meant to inspire hope, so I'm happy to hear you say that. Thanks so much!

[zainul]

I am very glad that I could feel your sincere endeavor.
Best luck.

[Christie]

Thank you, and the same to you. :-)

[zainul]

Thanks for the lovely gesture.

[Eloha]

I find this very expressive and poetic. Sounds like the modern condition, as if we are not certain we are living right.

[Christie]

You nailed it perfectly. Are we living right? Were humans meant for all of this? Those are questions that, depending on the day, enrich or plague my existence. Thank you for sharing your thoughts!

[Eloha]

They plague my existence too. Existentialism is one of the major themes of inspiration, yours too?

[Christie]

Yes, absolutely. Sartre is a huge influence of mine, too (maybe more so in my fiction than in my poetry, but I've yet to post any of my short stories or any pieces of my novella yet, and I've always wanted to try writing a play because of him! Maybe one about my own version of "Hell".) He's a king in the world of existentialism.

[Eloha]

I have a feeling you and I, will get along. :)

[Christie]

I have a feeling you are right, and I will look forward to more musings on writing, philosophy, and whatever else the winds of the web may blow our way. :-)

[LOfCharlemagne]

This is incredible, i love the detail and attention you put into this story. It feels very alive and realistic. I really love the paragraph that starts with "The sun climbs the sky with illuminated arms". Your use of personification really enhances the readers perception of what you are saying. It is very rich when it comes to analogies as well. I really appreciate what you have written here, great job! :)

[Christie]

I really appreciate you picking out what specifically caught your attention, and I am glad to hear you understood the analogies. Thank you so much for your review!

[LOfCharlemagne]

You are very welcome! Thank you for posting it.

[The Watcher]

This is really interesting, and I can picture everything happen bit by bit. It's very creative and well written as well. Kudos to you Christie!

100/100

[Christie]

I'm happy you enjoyed it. Thanks so much for reading and commenting!

[The Watcher]

You're very welcome madam!

[.]

I love this, the imagery and metaphors are amazing. I live the tea reference :)

[Christie]

Thanks, Cord. Did you mean love, or live? I think I like live better, anyways. :-)

[.]

Love. Lol