Promise Me

In Response to Vanessa's (Βανέσα) poem "Being" Inspired....

If you promise 

never 

To leave 

my side 

Sharing

 

with me 

the burden 

of my 

broken shoulders 

If you promise 

never 

To leave 

my side 

Until the night's 

ascending 

Into a new dawn 

If you promise 

never 

 

To leave 

my side 

 

In this 

whole world of 

miseries 

Then 

 

I would 

Let you 

Be.

Reviews

[emmajoy]

' f you promise ~ never ~ To leave ~ my side ~
Sharing .. '

Tis hard to leave someone's side when promises have been made somewhere else. Who's ever to know. There's both sadness and hope in this.. sometimes the two don't walk hand in hand.

A superb post, a very rational yet sensvtive way of being that not everyone has and some are too blind to accept.. .

(please forgive my typos. so very careless)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I'd say promises are harder kept but made easily enough...
Thank you for appreciating, Em. This was more of a post inspired by another post of a fellow writer. Thank you too for your insight here (:

[Giulia King]

"Sharing
with me
the burden
of my
broken shoulders" Absolutely beautiful!

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you, Gullia! I'm glad you liked it 😊

[Jibey]

You write with such romantic thoughts but also in a spirit of hope. There is a charm in the simplicity of the structure and language of this, and a sense of possible contentment... if...

[Dr. YumnaKay]

The style of writing isn't mine but yes thoughts are.
Thank you so much for your kind thoughts here, Jibey 😊

[boygene borice]

i love your way of writing.
your words have life in them,but in contemporary society, who is so sincere to keep a promise...just a few

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you, but this particular writing style is not mine. I just copied the style of a fellow writer here and this poem is in response to one of her poems ( as I mentioned in the description).
However, in regard with the topic, I agree with you. Promises are hard to keep.
Thank you again for the appreciation. 😊

[boygene borice]

Welcome always. :)

[Kesha]

i really liked this piece, i thought it was beautiful

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you, Kesha! I'm glad you liked it 😊

[Kesha]

you're welcome, hope your day is well :)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Sort of.. I hope yours is too 😊

[Kesha]

That's good :) mine is good, it's 9 am & I've been up since 11pm since last night. I work the night shift, but I don't have work tonight & any day where I don't work the night is a splendid day! Going to a hotel for 2 nights, just to relax :)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Good for you! Enjoy your moments of relaxation, Kesha 😊💜

[Kesha]

I will, thank you Yumna :)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Always welcome 😘

[Harley Quinn]

I really enjoyed reading it. Thank you for sharing. :)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you for the appreciation. It really means a lot to me. 😇

[Harley Quinn]

My pleasure :)

[V]

This is quite a response and I like it very much. An answer to the questions I displayed in my poem but I feel there's an almost demanding attitude in yours. It also makes me think of the giving and taking concept or images of puzzle like pieces maybe fitting shards or something. I always think pretty visually, sorry for my weird ideas..
You took over the style quite well too. I'm glad I could be an inspiration, always a good feeling to stir or provoke other people's creativity.
Thank you for sharing.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I'm glad it matches somehow with your poem. I was afraid it won't. Still, worth the try.
I see your point. I laid it this way because I am very demanding in my relationships. Isn't it fair to expect at least something in return for all the love we give.. Although, yeah it hurts when that isn't fulfilled.

And I aspire to be inspired and yours hit me pretty hard 😉
Thank you for the generous review, Vanessa.
P.S I'm quite visual too, don't worry 😛😂

[V]

You're very welcome. It was def worth the try. Good, I like visual people. It's inevitable for being able to create maybe..

I seems to be only fair but in the end it's the expectations, mainly way too high ones, that destroy everything. It's a difficult path though to be willing to experience a person purely and without too many expectations.. Ridding yourself completely of them is maybe not achievable but at least keeping it in mind..

Have a lovely day filled with inspiration and thanks again :)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Hmm but you can not expect a person not to expect... We can only strive to be better as time passes..
You too 😊

[V]

I didn't say that ;) Of course you can't... Yes better or wiser as in knowing how to deal with people by experience. Thank you. Another ordinary and long working day..

[Dr. YumnaKay]

And with each day, I learn more how people are not what they seem which of course adds to the bitter experiences..
I would gladly have long working days. Anything to keep the mind off things..

[V]

No unfortunately many aren't...
The working hours don't keep my restless mind from thinking, either..

[BBP]

Gorgeous write ... It'd make a beautiful set of vows.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you so much, Bev! Vows.. I never thought of that..

[Tony Jordan]

The influence of Vanessa's unique stylings are very evident here Yumna. It's quite an homage to her in my opinion but I'm sure also a great feeling for her, to see you adopt her style for this. So quid pro quo perhaps.
The deeper sentiments in this - supporting broken limbs for example - go far beyond the candy-coated friend pieces that we are used to seeing on WC.
Very well done my friend.
:)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I am quite inspired by her style of writing,Tony. And yes, I observed and copied her style so no brilliance of mine here lol

But yes, that poem of her was quite stuck to me, to which I felt an obligation to answer. I'm sure you've read that one.

Thank you for appreciating this small effort, TJ! Your words mean a lot to me 😊

[Tony Jordan]

I too find her layout stylings inspiring.
I am just off to read Vanessa's poem now.
You're very welcome.
:)

[Surya]

Promises every loved one needed, though granted for some...
Well done Yumna..
Thank you for sharing..

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I agree. Thank you so much. Much humbled by your kind words 😊

[Phill Oz O'fee]

Keeping promises is considered a measure of one’s worth; we prize being “as good as our word”. However, when I read your composition, with the long breathes between each stanza, suggests we have so many out-of-awareness thoughts and feelings, we may not “know” of our unconscious ambivalence about a stated commitment. Can we trust a promise made … I assume we must!
Great write.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

That's a brilliant observation! This poem was written in response to a fellow writer's poem. If you go through that poem, you'll see that I copied her style. In short I was inspired by her to write this one and the line breaks too.
Thank you for the thoughtful review. I'm glad you liked it. 😊