Fish Market

 

I  love to visit fish market .

Walking slowly with a basket

I look at the diverse collection

and enjoy their presentation.

 

Sometimes I  move around

and listen to  various sound

that a marketplace can offer

with bargain of customer.

 

I also look at the  fish vendor

to see how happy or sad his face.

This is really a great wonder

how he manages his work with grace.

 

I am afraid the vendor will lose his job

when the water body will die of pollution.

My journey to fish market will stop

if the anarchy continues without solution.

 

 

Author's Note

http://www.flickr.com/photos/28479757@N07/4960278794/in/photostream/lightbox/

Reviews

[Mark]

An interesting little stroll through one of the happy moments of your life. Thank you for sharing.
Might I offer a few suggestions, to make your poem more approachable to native English-speakers?
For starters, your first two stanzas were in a-a-b-b "couplet" mode, while the last two were in
a-b-a-b "quatrain" mode. I would recommend choosing one or the other and staying with it throughout.
I would like to work with you, if you wish it, to make your flow more natural. Your syllable counts vary too widely, and the stresses do not fall regularly. This is not as difficult as it might at first appear...but admittedly, I would not attempt it in Urdu or Farsi, so you are already way ahead of me!

[zainul]

Thank you Mark for stopping by to review my work.
I welcome your nice gesture to work with me to make the flow more natural.
I appreciate you for being very generous to me.
I understood the point of "couplet" mode and "quatrain" mode.
I felt the problem while writing this piece. I confess,I wanted to post the piece for taking advantage to edit later.
Please send your suggestions about modes and syllables to me as messages.That will help me as tutorials.

[Cryingkate]

Oh Dear Mark, Consider this please.
I hope Zainul does not change anything... We are so fortunate thru internet to meet people so far away that we would of never known in our life.

This diversity has been such a pleasure for me. When I listen and read from others like Zainul they all have a certain way of using the English language as we know in their own special way.
This to me is so Beautiful ! They somehow convey parts of their language and way and of word usage that I do not want to see changed. I can hear them speak as though in their own language yet with English words.
What I'm trying to say is something like a song and 50 Beautiful singers They all are unique and sing it special unto themselves. There is no two singers sounding alike.

Well so it is with the poetry somehow they each have their own style. I do not want the writers to change and conform to one set of rules.
For me I am not looking at the count and syllables. I am looking at the Heart and the Message and the individual Spirit that is delivering the message.

If this was categorized as a certain Ballad, Sonnet etc... ok then there's an issue of categorizing.
But for free style I say "Touch Not That Is"

I would like to add though that I think you are sweet and kind offering your knowledge and time to help someone learn and improve on skills.
But from my view I treasure it more just as it is in it's "Pristine" package.

Connie

[Cryingkate]

Must also add, I don't even see any flaws, The whole message is beautifully presented to me .Maybe it's like I said: I hear the Beauty and see no flaws.

[Praveeta]

I like the happiness projected by your first three stanzas and how you have touched environmental issue in the last stanza. Pollution will trigger a chain reaction where everyone will suffer, the fish community, the vendor and the buyers. Thanks for your contribution towards environment issues.

[zainul]

Thank you dear for the insightful review.
I am very glad to have have your support towards environment issues.

[Praveeta]

You are welcome talented poet :)

[zainul]

This is my pleasure,lovely poet.:)

[Emalie Todd]

Just as my dear friend: GreenTulipLove, has said: "This poems holds two different tones- a happy tone when it starts and then a sadder but serious tone at the end. How you managed to do so is incredible. Your chose of words is an incredible way to show of that. You set up the atmosphere of the fish market quite nicely in the first stanza, and keep with it throughout the entire poem. "When you wrote: My journey to {the} fish market will stop, if the anarchy continues without solution." These last two lines pushed forth a set of emotions that made me scared for the fish vendors, and sadden for all people who love to go and walk through the fish market to chose their selection of fish. This entire poem is emotionally powerful. A Great write once again."

This is one of the best poems I have read. It is amazing.

[zainul]

Dear Mintosaurus.I am very glad to know you liked the poem and its message.
Thank you for your amazing review and nice compliments.

[sonnie ibadah]

this is incredible...you have so much talent, each poem you write shows how versatile you can be. thank you for sharing.

[zainul]

Thank you Sonnie for the admiring review and compliments.
I feel very inspired by your generous words.

[sonnie ibadah]

you are so kind, its a great pleasure reading your work.

[Catherine Frain]

This poems holds two different tones- a happy tone when it starts and then a sadder but serious tone at the end. How you managed to do so is incredible. Your chose of words is an incredible way to show of that. You set up the atmosphere of the fish market quite nicely in the first stanza, and keep with it throughout the entire poem. "When you wrote: My journey to {the} fish market will stop, if the anarchy continues without solution." These last two lines pushed forth a set of emotions that made me scared for the fish vendors, and sadden for all people who love to go and walk through the fish market to chose their selection of fish. This entire poem is emotionally powerful. A Great write once again.

[zainul]

Katie,I have no suitable words to return your favor.
I feel very honored by your insightful admiring review.
Thanks for glorifying the piece.

[Catherine Frain]

You are very much welcome.

[zainul]

The pleasure is mine.

[Angel]

I like the serene happiness you portray at your visit to the fish market.
You are right to be concerned about pollution...it is taking a terrible toll upon the world we share.
It is everywhere, my friend.
I do pray that we might find a solution...and soon, or it may be more than the fish market at risk!!

[zainul]

Thank you Angel for inspiring me by your admiring review.
I feel very happy that you are praying for the solution of such grave problems.

[Sheila Kline]

It is interesting that you are able to convey the atmosphere of the fish market in a positive sense and then tell us of the plight of the market in lieu of the many problems that plague the industry! Environmental maladies shall surely affect the future of this fine offering in your country!
Thank you for sharing with us in such a personal manner my friend! It is something I would not have otherwise thought of!!

[zainul]

I feel very honored and blessed that you have added such enlightening and admiring review,Dear Sheila.I am already alarmed t note that environmental maladies have seriously affected the fish resources worldwide.One of the reasons for my frequent visits to fish markets is to look for Tuna fish which is required for my son for his special dietary demand as a gymnast.You may be sad to learn that I could not find a single Tuna for purchase for months together.The fish reserve of Tuna might
have diminished so much that fishermen could not capture any of them from the sea.This resulted to zero supply of the species.I know a group of fish vendors who used to sell exclusively marine fish left the profession due to the lack of supply of marine fish.
I am very glad that you provided such compassionate comments for this vital aspects of our life,livelihood and environment.

[tyson]

I found the ending to be quite sad. These problems affect more people around the world than they realise. I am finding your work to consistently portray a very sincere message. It's always a privilege to read a piece filled with passion

[zainul]

I feel very honored that you have found the message I am trying to share.
I am very optimistic that the situation may improve by the positive action of conscious people like you.
Thank you for stopping by to glorify this work.:)

[tyson]

I have a feeling you might be right. The world is starting to wake up and become one. Not at all, thank you for writing this work!

[zainul]

The pleasure is mutually ours.
I am very pleased to know that I have so many friends across the globe who share similar positive feelings.

[Michelle N. H.]

I have Family in Asia and going to the market in that part of the world indeed is a journey with so many things going on simultaneously! In spite of this, I really like how you depict yourself walking around unhurriedly with a basket in hand while modestly taking in the surroundings. The slow pace surely creates a contrast to an otherwise lively atmosphere a typical fish market, as I know it, has to offer.

[zainul]

Thank you Michelle for the precious review imbibed with your personal experience of Asian fish market.
I feel very blessed and honored to have such compliments and contributions that have enriched me immensely.
Thanks for stopping by to glorify this piece.

[Vidya Bacchus]

mornin mr zainul .You truly paint a vivid picture with your words.You are most excellent.

[zainul]

Morning to you too Ms Vidya.
I feel very pleased to read your admiring review.
This means a world to me.