Hold Still

sheets float down through white sunlight
burying admiration

definitions and ideas of gracefulness
lay still teeth clenched

wear silence like a badge

 

the perpetual mindfuck
insides recoiling memory fetal positions
time passes between forgotten blinks

just lay still teeth clenched

curl up in silence; stolen empty space

failed reflections

distoritons

endless f*****g fun house mirrors
just lay still teeth clenched

holding silence like knife

 

lay still

teeth clenched

swallow your attempts

like a sleeping pill

like a suicide.

 

Reviews

[Naomi Montana Walsh]

holding silence like knife to your own throat
That is a brillant line..
A feeling I can totally relate to.

[Jeff Loquist]

This reads like a nightmare..."time passes between forgotten blinks" really resonates. A soft flowing style that delivers a huge punch. Very well crafted

[Micah_s5]

The words really just shred into you. Makes you feel every line like a memory being played over in a dream.

[Hello, Goodbye]

I love the unrestrained phrases that you use which really makes it creative in its passion. My curiosity kept on being peaked and I just loved the little visuals you sent to my mind. Great job..

[Gandré]

This sounds like a personal experience and I perceived that you are describing a state of perplexity or bewilderment, very intensive reading and compelling experience within your lines. Great job! Thanks for your interest for my person but I don't have a friends list. I keep friends in my heart, you are there now, too. regards from germany, l. gandr�

[Travis Lawrence]

Everything about your style in this poem is sharp -- the imagery, the diction, the allusions, etc. And the ending really cuts deep, "like a sleeping pill / like a suicide", it's bitter and beautiful. I really admire the way the whole thing sounds when read aloud.

Oh, and the first two lines are incredible, it's like something Jeff Mangum would sing.

Have a nice day!

[Jenny Davis]

Very introspective and deep...I really dug the metaphors. The last stanza was very poignant and made me think of all the things we go through to be something...I liked this a lot :)

[Baby Boy]

Wow! I was glued to this read the whole way through! You have a creative and unique write here sweetie and I can tell that you are one that knows how to truly express herself! Great job if I must say so myself! I loved it! Keep up the good work sweetie! One luv Miss Arsonist! :)


-JC-

[Static C]

This almost seems to be a poem about a surgical procedure unwanted/wanted internal conflict. Powerful Imagery completely removed from the cliche`.