Bad memories

Bad memories

A Poem by Zombie Dutcher

i'm sitting here staring at this screen 
i'm wondering if you'll ever understand what i mean
or even hell, will i?
will i stay confused until the day that i die
when will the day draw nigh?
when i can wipe another tear from my eye? 
only i know that i'm crying inside
only i know this is me trying to hide
i've got more fears than a paranoid crack head
but i hide behind more walls than a Pharaoh of the undead
who knows what i want?
maybe a life i could flaunt?
show of to the world
or show off  to a girl
i just want a smile to stick to my face
that no matter the pressure no weight can erase
but in my mind i see only black
and looking back
i realise whose fault is that

its my own
for my own sins i must attone
my own mistakes i did create
i should have calculated what i put at stake
but i didn't and i forgot
i hit and missed my shot
so many inner demons have i fought 
and still
i don't have any will
or any room to feel
is this what they claim is real?
well take it back, i'll live in my mind
lock the door and throw the key inside
but I can't. I've never been one to hide
now that the feelings are out there like targets
I just want you to know writing this song was the hardest
but I know this was more for me than for you
I just have to show myself what I have to do
give me time, like a perfect rhyme
I'm gonna have to put in some work
and at first its gonna hurt
but in the end, it doesn''t even matter
i'm using this time like its a personal ladder
helping me climb and grow up
instead of staying stuck

© 2014 Zombie Dutcher


Author's Note

Zombie Dutcher
idk if this one was finished i may come back and add more

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Added on February 8, 2014
Last Updated on February 8, 2014

Author

Zombie Dutcher
Zombie Dutcher

Boise, ID



About
I'm a pretty laid back guy whose been writing since people told me to stop talking so much and put it on paper. I enjoy sci-fy and demonic type writings. I write songs and wraps along with a 4 book se.. more..

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A Poem by Zombie Dutcher