the letter i can’t actually send.

A Poem by ac

Moving on from someone who left you torn.

the scent of you no longer lingers in my sheets, but the memories are embedded into the comfort of them.
the memories that used to provide such warmth now provide hurt.
sadness and anger trail not far behind the “happy times” that now slap me with the harsh reality that you left
leaving me with a longing for something that ceases to exist.
but sometimes, if i close my eyes and inhale deep enough, the smell of you comes back.
along with the laughter and passion that could not prevail in our bond.
i look for your kisses and adoration on the lips of another, and to my deep despondency, it’s never there.
i open my eyes to a stranger.
not the dark brown eyes that used to smile at me.
not the full lips that once told me they loved me.
not the laugh that filled me with butterflies, yet has never made me feel more at home.
a stranger. someone who i am sure has stories, but none that i am willing to open my ears to.
it’s like i’m searching and searching yet i can never find you.
i’m not ready.
i opened my heart up to you, only for you to occupy the space with one foot out the door.