Her Longing

A poem for those who relate.

She's lying in her bed chamber

Her eyes softly closed

She opens them to the sound

Of sunlight dancing in.

Its soft foosteps lift her lids.

Her emerald eyes glimmering with life

Swimming with sadness.

She's unimpressed with the room around her

With the jewels and gold sparkling divinely.

Her fiery, scarlet hair falls in her face,

Blocking one mournful tear,

For no riches could compare

To the love of her Jacques.

Reviews

[not your typical girl]

"Its soft footsteps lift her lids." WOW! That line blew me away.
Soft footsteps of sunlight...you described that feeling when your eyes are closed and you can feel the sunlight on your lids... that was a perfect description.
Each thing I read from you gets better and better. I'm so impressed. And you're 14? Wow, you have so much time to learn so much more, and you're already so talented.. I still can't get over that line!

[SoulCrusader (Yas)]

So true indeed, I have a poem I'm working just on the same subject. Great write:)

[steph]

This is such a sweet romantic piece, everything about it screams, Love and romance... The rhythm in the poem was also romantic, it was like watching her yearning longing for Jacques in her head... Excellent piece!

[GreenSkeleton16]

oh, and "Its soft footsteps lift her lids." blew me away too!

[GreenSkeleton16]

:) ive had plenty of those moments of longing...lol good poem

[Twilight]

The overall meaning of this piece is clear - that riches can never be a satisfactory substitute for a loving relationship, between a man and his wife. Whilst reading, I wondered if any particular experience or event - influenced the writer to choose such a theme as this? The protagonist seems to be a princess or queen, perhaps? Whatever her status in society, she misses the love of that special someone in her life. Quite touching to read, in places. Thankyou, Graci! Keep writing!

[Dani]

Yeah, so no more "nobody likes my stuff" comments. Obviously you have some fans :P Your writing is slowly changing, and definitely for the better. I enjoyed this mucho.

[Marie Harrison]

So sad..beautiful picture you painted for us. Lovely.

[DespondentDreamer]

Lovely collection of words the imagery that is filled with emotion surely send the message..

[Truman S. Booth]

So true. You have a way of taking
philosophical ideals and presenting them in interesting, relatable stories. Thank you for sharing your talent.