Does My Bum Look Big In This ??

Does My Bum Look Big In This ??

A Story by Gee
"

Being tactful,

"
So, she who must be obeyed entered the living room wearing her latest purchase.

" Does my bum look big in this ? "

Already knowing the answer I looked up. The Good lady wife was holding her shirt just above waist height showing off
a floral patterned pair of leggings, skin tight, the daisies that adorned her cheek area stretched to the size of sunflowers, sunflowers with cellulite.

"No my sweet, if anything they highlight your curvaceous figure "

"Ahh, do you think so? they're not to bright ? I'm not to old to wear these ? do they give me a camels hoof ? "

" To bright, no dear the colour lifts your skin tone, to old, never, as for the camels hoof...."

As I said this she turned to face me. Jesus, 2 yards of material had disappeared into her nether regions, either side of which flaps formed, these, if plaid coated would not have looked out of place on a deer stalker hat.

" No dear, not a sign of a camels hoof "

"Ahh, thanks honey, they're not to big are they ? I'll wear these to the christening tomorrow "

She pecked me on the cheek and thundered upstairs to change.

At least the vicar would have somewhere to park his bike I thought to myself



© 2017 Gee



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Reviews

This is probably the one and only time you could have been tactfully honest. it doesn't do you justice love, how about the blue ones...

Posted 5 Months Ago


Gee

5 Months Ago

Just something silly, not true to life but no doubt to many.
Thank you
Hahaha.... here i am tittering to myself at the image . I like your diplomacy :)

Posted 5 Months Ago


Gee

5 Months Ago

Thanks Stella, thankfully not my wife but mannnnnn do you see some sights when out.
Partners .. read more
Stella Armour

5 Months Ago

haha.... plenty to grip a lot of the time :)
Tact, diplomacy and understanding, dear hubby had it in abundance, whatever the reality?

Haughty, naughty and hilarious!

Posted 6 Months Ago


Gee

6 Months Ago

Thanks Tom..
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I've often thought if a man is standing alone in a forest and his wife can't hear him. Is he still wrong?

Posted 6 Months Ago


Gee

6 Months Ago

Only if he is breathing Ken...
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder – then again – ‘Beauty’ was a horse!!! Very entertaining and humorous write (I wouldn’t share this with a feminist group though)... Bless ………..

Posted 6 Months Ago


Gee

6 Months Ago

lol, no, not a good idea. Cheers
HILARIOUS!!!! It's the funniest one I've ever seen!!

Posted 6 Months Ago


Gee

6 Months Ago

Thank you kindly
AwesomeSiya

6 Months Ago

Ur Welcome!! :)
Hilarious, and probably something experienced by thousands of husbands. Awesome descriptions abound in this story.

Posted 6 Months Ago


Gee

6 Months Ago

Cheers Clifford
the jaws of extremis it is
why would one not lie when the consequence of the truth lies heavy?
'no dear heart ... your big bum is ...' guaranteed death sentence

good read

Posted 6 Months Ago


Gee

6 Months Ago

Cheers, appreciate you taking the time to read and comment
What a sweet little piece of husbandly advice. Only thing to change was most of the "to's" to "too's". Otherwise, perfectly executed and hilarious.

Posted 7 Months Ago


Gee

7 Months Ago

Thank you Carol, will make the changes highlighted.
Black Rose

5 Months Ago

Hahaha! you described the bitter truth in the most sweet full way. 😅
The last line is pure murder. I just love it. I wouldn't dream of saying it to my wife, but... well maybe during the devorce.

Posted 7 Months Ago


Gee

7 Months Ago

Cheers, luckily not about my good lady

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Added on April 26, 2017
Last Updated on September 6, 2017

Author

Gee
Gee

Milton keynes, Buckinghamshire, United Kingdom



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No airs and graces, just a simple fella posting simple words. more..

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