Blog: An Empathetic Day

Blog: An Empathetic Day

A Story by Ibrahim Hoti
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A tale of a small example of empathy and its links to greater empathy and the teachings of many pieces of work.

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The way I see it, there are a few ways of dealing with different people; you can either get angry at others for doing things differently, or you can take the harder (yet more fruitful) route, and try to empathize with other people. After all, you can’t expect everybody to act exactly the way you do, and when you keep that in mind, the best way to work with people is to try to look through their eyes, and see why to do what they do. This is something that may not always be easy, but is beneficial, and can be achieved through maturity, self-control and keeping a cool head. I, personally, don’t manage to do this every time, but I have become a lot better at this over the past few years, and empathy is something I plan on exhibiting much more often as I further grow up and mature.

 

About one year back, a friend of mine had planned to go out for some community service, and a dinner in the evening. Over time, I had become increasingly excited about the plan and had marked it out for some time. The plan was for me to wait at a point, and for my friend to come, pick me up at 2pm and take me to PIMS (where the event was to take place). At 2:10, when my friend had still not arrived and I was waiting, I got my phone out and decided to call him. However, he didn’t seem to be picking up, and after another half an hour, I began to wonder how he could be taking so long to come. I looked back at our messages to check whether we had planned to meet up at 2, or if I had come at a wrong time. The time we had agreed upon was 2pm.

 

At this point, I was getting in a worse mood, and starting to get a bit annoyed, but I tried to do everything I possibly could do, to try to control myself and try to imagine what my friend, who’s barely ever late, must be going through. I decided to empathize, and after waiting a while more to make sure that my friend would not turn up, I called my car and went home. That evening, I wasn’t happy about missing the event, but I didn’t feel any anger, or any bad feelings towards my friend, as I believed that nearly all people have good intentions and them having a tough time doing something, does not mean they aren’t trying to do it or their intentions are in a different place. It wasn’t easy, but the belief that one can’t possibly judge someone else’s actions, without looking at the situation from their perspective, allowed me to now be angry towards my friend, but instead even feel concerned about the situation of my good friend.

 

Late that night, I received a call from my friend, apologizing for not showing up and explaining his situation. He told me that he was very sorry for not picking me up and that a close relative of his had been rushed to a hospital in Rawalpindi. I learned that he had been at that hospital all day and that he would have to be there for the next few days as well. Thus through looking at things from the perspective of other people, a situation that could have potentially been very harmful towards my relations with other people, was defused. As well as that, empathizing with people also allowed me to be more sensitive towards others and be more caring towards other people, instead of putting more pressure on them, without actually knowing what kind of problems they have to go through in their own lives. As a result of walking in my friend’s shoes, I was thus able to be a nicer, better person towards others, and hurt fewer people's feelings, and in the process gained a solid, good reputation with others. Another result was that I actually got to know more about other people, through looking at the situation from their eyes. Through this, I was enabled to see how they view problems and how they get around difficult situations. I would, therefore, be able to empathize more with my friend, in the future, and be an even better friend and in turn a better person, through knowing that valuable information.

 

All in all, I found that empathy is a great tool, not only in maintaining good human relations, but also in being a good and understanding person who’s rarely judgmental, and as a result, as morally correct a person as possible. Pieces of work like To Kill A Mockingbird, also do a great deal of good for making the world a more empathetic place, as their morals and compelling stories make people think more about what it means to empathetic and through characters like Atticus Finch, readers are also taught the importance of not ever judging anybody, before you take a walk in their shoes and see through their eyes. With more stress on empathy and these morals, I believe people do become a lot nicer and a lot more understanding towards the potentially tough situations other people could be going through, instead of judging people and worsening the lives of others without knowing their intentions and where their heads are.


© 2016 Ibrahim Hoti



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Reviews

Really lovely blog man, A lesson for us all to learn and well written

Posted 1 Year Ago


Excekkent blog. 99/100 by far

Posted 1 Year Ago


Good job, This is great writing

Posted 1 Year Ago


219335_One-Stop Publishing: free print & ebook publishing
Excellent article. Quite impressive

Posted 1 Year Ago


Yaar zabaradast blog. Very good moral too

Posted 1 Year Ago


A good blog and quite a good piece of writing as well. I like the way you start the blog.

Posted 1 Year Ago



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Added on June 27, 2016
Last Updated on August 3, 2016

Author

Ibrahim Hoti
Ibrahim Hoti

Islamabad, South Asia, Pakistan



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"We are here, not because we are law-breakers; we are here in our efforts to become law-makers."- Emmeline Pankhurst. "Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler."- Albert Ei.. more..

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