Proctology Proctor

Proctology Proctor

A Poem by barleygirl
"

inspired by recent Norman verse . . .

"


A bizarre thing about getting old:
an easy morning session is wholly extolled!
We who have canines are closely patrolled
to assist should exertions ever take hold.

Never lonely hunkered on the john
with my two furry friends urging me on
a commode conference at the break of dawn
multi-tasking as I grunt, pet, and yawn.

Washing up at the bathroom sink
I prevent the dogs from taking a drink
cleaning the seat with tongues so pink
reading me by my pee-mail and stink.




© 2017 barleygirl



Author's Note

barleygirl
Proctology = anything having to do with the butt/bum
Proctor = one who monitors

My Review

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Featured Review

When Barleygirl sought inspiration
For her latest poetic creation
She appears to enthuse
That I was her Muse
When writing about defecation.

Still, it's better than the crap I' m struggling with at the moment. ** Wink ***
Loved the picture, though Margie. (((Hugs)))










Posted 3 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Months Ago

You write limericks better than anyone I know! I've never written one before! Maybe that should be m.. read more



Reviews

nice poem, I love the write. thanks for sharing.

Posted 12 Hours Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

8 Hours Ago

Thank you for stopping by to share (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie
The title drew me and I loved it though I have no pets. Great humour just the way you write it!

Posted 2 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

2 Months Ago

To me the world has so many tragedies & sadness, I have to try to push against the pain in my writin.. read more
DIVYA

2 Months Ago

My pleasure always, dear friend! (Hugs)
Ha! So funny and wild! Form, flow & rhyme great- like a limerick...yes, I empathize- my doggy does not respect my privacy either! Title slays too! Big laugh from me!:):):) P.S. Norman's response is hilarious too:)

Posted 2 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

2 Months Ago

Norman does limericks better than anyone I know, especially with his wry humor & sassy spirit! It's .. read more
A poem about sitting on the john with doggies watching....Margie, you can make anything sound wonderful! Smiling here....I liked it and your humor. Lydi**

Posted 3 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Months Ago

I never looked at it that way! I'm blessed with an optimistic streak, I guess! *smile* Thanks for yo.. read more
i like your poem, it gave me a smile, as well as norman's poetic response.

Posted 3 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Months Ago

I've been blessed with TWO poetic responses from Norman this week! We must be on similar trains! Tha.. read more
How nice it must be to have support during those difficult moments. I can't count the number of times I've been grunting and crying on the marble throne and wished I had someone's paw to hold. Just as long as they don't get nasty afterward. . .

Posted 3 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Months Ago

This is so damn hilarious, you could polish it up into a short story! *wink! wink!* Of course, I kno.. read more
Humans greet by shaking hands, dogs by butt sniffing, that's just there thing and what we may perceive as disgusting in canine world is perfectly normal and acceptable!

Wonderfully creative with pleasing doggie input, who would be without them, eh BG?

Posted 3 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Months Ago

I've been living alone with dogs for so long, I happen to be largely guided by scents myself. WARNIN.. read more
Lol - this is classic. And the pet audience - I can relate lol. I almost expect them to hold up score cards like in competitive diving.
But on a more helpful note, I think some local night classes in mathematics might help speed up the morning...ahem...process BG - there they teach you to work hard stuff out with a pencil.

Posted 3 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Months Ago

You are so freakin' funny! I'm laughing off my chair. As we all know, art does not always resemble l.. read more
Much better than my usual reading matter when in there. 'Now please wash your hands, now please wash you hands...
Note:That joke may fall a little flat on your side of the pond as I don't know if they print that on the poorer type of loo paper. As they once did, I hasten to add, over here.
As an aside when producing my first thesis many moons ago I was looking for a word that meant to deify and I came up with the gem deifecate. Which rather polarises the problem don't you think?

Posted 3 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Months Ago

As you explore & explain new words (to me) I am entertained becuz you clearly picked up on my love o.. read more
Ha ha ha … very good! You are not alone with this inventive write - Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart displayed scatological humour in his letters and a few recreational compositions. Hope you have scented paper …. :-)

Posted 3 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Months Ago

Thank you for not only giving me kudos, but also teaching me a few things in your review. I love it .. read more

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Added on July 13, 2017
Last Updated on July 13, 2017

Author

barleygirl
barleygirl

Central Coast, CA



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Just loving life & sharing my blessings. more..

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