Hansel and Gretel

Hansel and Gretel

A Chapter by Dave Brown



When the woodsman remarried

Hansel and Gretel were badly harried

His step-wife always in a bad mood

Even annoyed when they ate any food

Told the woodsman they had to go

So she could save their extra food dough

Either that or she’d get a new beau


The weak woodsman took them in tow

For two little kids a terrible blow

Alone in woods as day lost its glow

How to survive, they just didn’t know


Then their luck, met a wee mouse

Took them to a gingerbread house

As they started eating the siding

An old witch, jumped out of hiding

She grabbed them both by the seat

But the mouse down by her feet

Excess gingerbread, did repeat

Witch dropped the kiddies in dismay

Screamed in disgust and ran away


The three ramsacked her place

What they found was a disgrace

When they tipped her trunk on its side

Jack and Jill’s pail, they first wide-eyed

Then Cinderella’s shoe, with blood splatters

Miss Muffet’s tuffet all in taters


The ragged bloodied shank of a sheep

Carrying the brand of Little Bo Peep

Tom’s extremely small ravaged thumb

Jack’s half eaten plum

A bit of the scalp of the Mad Hatters

Including other unmentionable matters


But there, down deep in the fold

From stolen hearts, a pot of gold


They’ve since created a rodent sanctuary

Step mother cleans it none too merrily

On her knees, spoon feeds the mouse

An example of nasty, step-wife therapy






© 2020 Dave Brown

My Review

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If you're going to flood the board with work this you really should learn at least the basics of structured poetry. Prosody is off, you're forcing the line to the needs of the rhyme, and in general, making all the newbie mistakes. Take a look at the excerpt for Stephen Fry's, The Ode Less Traveled, on Amazon. It can help.

Posted 9 Months Ago

Dave Brown

9 Months Ago

thanks for your pleasant suggestion Jay
I'll look if I get a chance but all my writing/damage.. read more

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Added on September 1, 2020
Last Updated on September 1, 2020

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Dave Brown
Dave Brown

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