"Healthy" Limericks

When you first get the scent of a rose
And a tickling starts in your nose,
Followed by wheezing,
Eyes watering and sneezing
Then you’re allergic to them, I suppose.

If you're going bald, I've just read
"Rub a raw onion into your head."
There's no proof it works, though
But this much I know.
Any friends that you had, will have fled.

The eponymous Vicar of Bray
Rode his horse round his parish each day
But the traumatic lesions
On his saddle-sore regions
Made him glad, when he knelt down to pray.

 

Hypochondriacs are easy to find

With this simple test, I’ve just designed

Hold a party at night

Then turn off the light

And  wait for someone  to scream “I’ve gone blind”

Reviews

[Cyprian Van Dyke]

Good job on the limerick character of this poem and what your words meant was amazing as well. "Rub a raw onion into your head." this line made me chuckle, tyfs

[Norman 223]

Thank you, Cyprian. I love limericks, as they have a great rhythm and don't take long to type. At my age, that's becoming important. :-)
N.

[Patricia Wedel]

Party Time !!! is just ahead..,
So please do not go to Bed...
An Orchestral will soothe your Soul
as Violins play for forgetful lovers...
Amen.. yours truly, Pat

[Samuel Dickens]

You sure haven't lost your edge for humour... or cleverness with words. Four for the price of one! You know, I think that onion might be worth trying. It might work for saddle sores, too.

[Norman 223]

Thanks Sam, but saddle sores don't need any extra stimulus. They're just a pain in the a**e as they are.
Norm.

[Samuel Dickens]

Ha! I've not had saddle sores since the sixties, but my butt still smarts!

[barleygirl]

You do limericks better than anyone I've ever seen! Your limericks make me want to write limericks. But this batch is truly your finest, so far. I love the fresh imagination, the way you pick topics never found in poems & then you twist each idea into some unexpected pretzel of truth-telling. I'm in awe of these limericks! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Norman 223]

Thanks, Margie. Sorry for the delay, but computer and hands have been incompatible for a few weeks..
Norm.

[barleygirl]

No worries! I've been prone to tangents alot in 2020! It's been a weird year! (((HUGS)))

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I keep worrying that i may need the second one here...that damn onion...

and as to the first stanza...i have grown to think love is allergic to me.

and please, Norman...don't turn off that light! Thank you.

[Norman 223]

Thank you ,Jacob. My apologies, however. I wrote this to cheer you up. ....must try harder!
N.