Haiku-ing with Lorry

Haiku-ing with Lorry

A Poem by barleygirl
"

or maybe extreme senryu-ing . . .

"

Vaping Hipsters . . . by Lorry

Clouds of pretension
camouflaging their lack of
personality.

Reviewing the 17-syllable poem by Lorry (above)
I admired his use of multisyllabic words saying:
I want to try doing only one word per line . . .

* * * * * * * * *

Natch, Lorry (the witty one) comes right back with:

Communicating
autobiographical
creativity.


* * * * * * * * *

My feeble attempt to touché Lorry . . .

Tyrannosaurus
unapologetically
misogynistic.

Accelerating
individuality
momentarily.

Pedagogical
oversimplification
disingenuous.

You know you wanna try it . . .

© 2019 barleygirl


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Featured Review

If i were the paranoid type, (who said that?) ' I'd be worrying youve been talking to ghosts of my past, but for some inexplicable reason, people always end up naming me dinosaur names, maybe because im always complaining i cant find jackets to fit because of my teeny arms. (nothing at all to do with being a dinosaur, as in old, and close to extinction.)
Dont go believing all Miss Ogony tells you Shes no stranger to putting people in their place, and some of those whip marks pre-date me knowing her.
If she gives you any trouble, tell her youve seen the photos and i couldnt leave teeth marks on my own a*s. That should put her gas at a peep.

Ps... Margie Barleygirl.
Californiacatingly,
Meducational 😀

Hope four words is acceptable.
Love this Margie. Im screenshotting that and having it on my phones home screen. 😀

Posted 4 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

4 Weeks Ago

No, it's a different tyrannosaurus I'm referring to on this website *wink! wink!* I'm way envious of.. read more
Lorry

4 Weeks Ago

Ill still be in and out. Will be online on saturdays through december at work, so you ll only be get.. read more
Lorry

4 Weeks Ago

And i didnt know she was Miss Claus, did i? 😀



Reviews

I love your play with Haiku words! Excellent! And creative!

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Weeks Ago

Thanks for stopping by to advocate playing with words! (Some take themselves a little seriously, I m.. read more
Inappropriate
Anesthesiologist
Investigation

Now that you people have convinced me to try poetry, I get to hang around in threads like this.

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Weeks Ago

You're funny! *wink! wink!* Your haiku is nebulous (a good thing) in that we don't know if the "A" i.. read more
Oh s**t....nope, that seems like a suicide mission!!!!

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Weeks Ago

Writing those kinda reminded me of premature ejaculation . . . dreaming of some pie-in-the-sky haiku.. read more
A lot of touche's and creative introduces coming alive lately. All help add flavor to this site. Enjoyed what is deployed...

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Weeks Ago

To be honest, being at the cafe every morning is probably the most mind-stimulating thing I do, besi.. read more
Sami Khalil

3 Weeks Ago

Hahaha. We will not charge you for that. You are welcome Margie along with the Fed Ex man if he like.. read more
Not so feeble. Loved all three; though I couldn't help but think, 'What if your Tyrannosaurus was of the female variety. :))

Now my turn...

Indefinitely
ergonomically
unsatisfactory.

Beccy.

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Weeks Ago

LOVE your stab at this extreme senryu-ing! I can feel the elbows & corners poking my gizzard from he.. read more

Blimey... this is more brill that a shoal full of flat fish and I'm a flat fish aficionado (FINS) fondly ... Me x

Oh' n that's Me not Mex x

Posted 4 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This comment has been deleted by the poster.
barleygirl

3 Weeks Ago

I seem to have had a rash of dinosaurs coming at me lately. But no worries! I'll slay them with my w.. read more
Neville

3 Weeks Ago

(SINS) always do it for me... my pleasure and true (GRINS) fondly N :)
Looks like fun; I'll have a bash later.

T

Posted 4 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Weeks Ago

Thanks for stopping by to help tidy up my ship *wink! wink! Fondly, Margie
This is something everyone should do from time to time, for oneself. Step out of the conventional, think out of the box and unusual. Play with words and see where it goes. It whets creativity and keeps boredom away. The tyrannosaurus is so funny!

Posted 4 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

4 Weeks Ago

The other writers on this website have pushed me way beyond what I used to believe was "good writing.. read more
Margie, this is why I've generally avoided haiku and most other fixed forms of poetry. It's out of my league. You and Lorry show not only a mastery but good humor with it. I kneel in awe, smiling.

Posted 4 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

4 Weeks Ago

I used to love doing poems to form, but then I stopped for the past couple years. The problem with p.. read more

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Added on November 15, 2019
Last Updated on November 15, 2019

Author

barleygirl
barleygirl

Central Coast, CA



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Just loving life & sharing my blessings. more..

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