My First Home

My First Home

A Poem by alienated.aquarius
"

trying to experiment writing micro-poems

"

Some call me cold

but when you’re raised in a womb

not quite warm enough

it’s no wonder why I shiver. 

Poetry chapbook 'Sonder' now available on Amazon!

© 2019 alienated.aquarius


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Reviews

Interesting thought. Very good.

Posted 3 Months Ago


Short but poignant. I like the irony of the tittle. The word "home is usually associated with warmth and safety and belonging, here it means the opposite. Nice one. :)

Posted 3 Months Ago


This poem is short, but it speaks volumes. Being born into an unwanted family that is as uncaring and feeling as the world is becoming spoke volumes

Posted 3 Months Ago


Coldness inside the womb is a picture of unwanted child that is born into a uncaring family. The child has a lot to overcome to find true love. Nice write ;-]

Posted 3 Months Ago


The idea of "cold womb" really threw me at first, until I read Jacob's review & started thinking about carrying a child that's not wanted. A so-called "micro poem" should pack a punch in few words & the startling scene you paint leaves the reader with a ton to ponder (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 3 Months Ago


a very well delivered write, nicely done

Posted 3 Months Ago


good concept, I think you maybe could have put more thought into it to help your rhymes but good for an experiment.

Posted 3 Months Ago


sometimes our mothers never really wanted us...or they are just not people of great warmth...i bet it can get quite cold in there...and once we come out...there is still that shiver from the memory.
j.

Posted 3 Months Ago


Loved this short form poem and its starkness as the protagonist rationalises their sangfroid personality as a result of heredited characteristics. Final line I might have made flow with something like:
'It's little wonder you shiver'

Posted 3 Months Ago



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223 Views
9 Reviews
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Added on June 25, 2019
Last Updated on June 25, 2019
Tags: poem, poetry, poet, mental health, mental illness, depression, anxiety, parents

Author

alienated.aquarius
alienated.aquarius

Buffalo, NY



About
Hi! I'm Catie. i write things (poems, fiction, blogs/articles) and try to publish them. i love chasing waterfalls and sunsets. i was born at a very young age. i can pick things up with my toes. i'm ob.. more..

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