Heartbroken

This is one of the lowest points im my life, when my girlfriend of three years and I parted ways. This is what I felt the day after.

Standing there

People swirling all around

Faces unseen

Words unheard

Like living water flowing around a rock

 

Unmoving, feeling nothing, completely inanimate

One continuous thought flowing

Its over

Her words still sting cutting deeply

Burning with a cold flame

 

One foot moves then the other

A breathe, a beat

He walks

Leaving a trail of blood

From where his heart had been pulled out and shattered

 

He feels the hoodie in his hand

He hoodie she once wore

He pulls it on, hidingthe hurt

The pain

The hole where once had been flesh

Reviews

[LlamaLord]

This was really great. I think some you made some grammar mistakes though. Doesn't really matter to me, but some readers think it take away from the emotion. Anyway, really great poem. I loved the part about the hoodie. Great couple of lines in that part!
"He feels the hoodie in his hand

He hoodie she once wore

He pulls it on, hidingthe hurt

The pain

The hole where once had been flesh"

Great piece

[Baylin Snow]

This was so powerful, it left me in tears by the end! One of my favorite poems i've read all night!

[Ryan]

I am crying. This poem is so meaningful, and if this happend to you or anyone else that you know, im extremely sorry and sympathetic to you. Because I went through the same thing, twice, I'm still not over it and it "stings" still, as you put it in your poem. Over all I love this peice of writing, and I will be reading it frequently if you don't mind. lol