Kalyn

This is a true story, I really do still love this girl.

 

The music blaring behind us, people dancing around us and the sin was flowing through my veins hoping, urging to take control. I brushed my face over her soft silky brown hair, the feelings inside me screaming to come out. We danced faster and faster, wishing I could spin her around or at least do something to impress her. When the song ended I held her from behind close to my body. She looked up at me and gently kissed my waiting lips. I couldn't help but to stare deep into her eyes, I was captured and no matter how hard I tried I wouldn't have escaped the clutches of her beauty.

Her friends surrounded us, watching and waiting. I spoke softly into her ear, "will you go out with me?" She turned her head away as to rethink her decision , stepped out of arms reach, turned around and smiled. The three seconds that took her to come back to me and wrap her arms around me seemed to take an eternity. When she breathed on my neck she sent a chilling yet exquisite sting that flew up and down my spine. With that delicious breath approached  the most beautiful pronunciation of the word yes that I had ever heard. "Yes," she said. My heart must have skipped time itself, the passion, the love I undeniably felt for her was shining as if it were a diamond.

As the night came to an end, I walked her to her car and bid her goodnight. I could not let her go. I held her in my arms and stared deeply into her eyes, I was lost and hoping to never be found. Unfortunately she said she had to go, I told her I understood and kissed her goodnight.
After I had gotten home that night I called up my mother and my sister and informed them of the excellent news.

We almost never went on dates so we mainly just had fun together. Walking around and holding hands, just talking. I always though about what we should discuss during these wanderings, but I rarely had a great deal to talk about. ”God!” she said, “your hands are always so cold!” I loved walking and talking but for some strange reason my hands would freeze up when I was around her. Sure the hallways I met her in were a bit chilly but not enough to solidify me. The foot ball games were constantly great times, even through the hard times. Every time I managed to do something wrong not only at football games but anywhere, she would just drop my hand and walk away saying whatever. Looking back I don’t know if that meant that she really cared about us, or if that’s just her way of saying she does care but she has too much on her shoulders.

I met her mother one cold distinct night. She was selling pizza for a fundraiser, when Kalyn tried to sneak me past her. Finally I convinced Kalyn into going over and introducing me to her mother, although it cost me all my pepperoni off my pizza that I bought to try, too look like a nice guy. “Hurry up! Stop making out and let’s go mom is waiting outside,” yelled Meaghan. Meaghan was Kalyn’s sister and my ex-girlfriend. I started dating Meaghan in High School but it ended up not working out because of some rumors that were going around. I said goodbye to Kalyn and watched her leave, her beautiful hair frolicking as she scurried out the door. After she left I spent the rest of my evening helping Mark, a friend of mine who needed help organizing for the next game day.

One night I received a call from my sister, informing me on a comment that was made by my new girlfriend. Astonished at what Kalyn had written, the next morning I asked her quite plainly about it. “I never meant to write that,” she said. Looking at me like I was destroying her, telling me she couldn’t believe that I would think she would cheat on me. “I never accused you of cheating on me I just wanted to know why you would say that you still loved your ex boyfriend and that you didn’t even like your current one,” I said. My heart ripping in two could not help but feel her pain. Her beautiful auburn brown eyes started to turn taupe, tears gently sloping down her soft scarlet cheeks. The anger inside me began to die, the sorrow and love began to return as I watched her rage past me toward her minute group of friends. Thinking my self to be an utterly foolish a*****e I briskly scampered past the, trying to seem as pissed off as possible.

            Walking faster and faster hoping to get as far away as possible from the girl I once loved. Suddenly as the thought of “throwing the white flag” came across my mind my telephone rang. Without checking I flipped open my phone and said, “Yes?” I only used that voice when I could not think of what to say, hoping the prolonged, deep tone would make the person on the other end laugh or somehow stall. What luck I have, the high pitched yell surprised me, “what did you do?” It was Meaghan, “what,” I asked, as if I knew nothing of the events that took place this morning. She sounded stressed, her voice almost breaking as she said, “Kalyn is over her crying on the floor and she wont say anything except, that it is your fault!” “I didn’t…” I tried to stammer out something but she cut me off, “you get your a*s over here and fix this, RIGHT NOW!!!” I didn’t have to have the phone to hear her scream, those words of such high demand. “Where are you at,” I asked. There was no answer, “where are you,” still no reply. I looked down at my phone, the normal background of Kalyn and I at a football game. Kalyn did not know that I took the picture of us when we were kissing, she might have gotten angry if she knew I did have it.

 

            For a few moments I stood there looking at the picture, wishing that all this would just disappear and we could go back to being happy. “Watch out man!” Unknowingly I was standing in the middle of the hallway, blocking all traffic through. “Sorry.” I looked at the time, I only had a few minutes to get to Kalyn and try to fix what I had apparently broken this morning. I was running through the hallways searching every corner hoping to find her in time. “Hey no running!” a teacher yelled as I ran past her. I ran out into the courtyard and down the main hall when I saw her sprawled out crying on the floor. I dashed over to her and slid on the tile to come down to her level so I could look her in the eyes. As soon as my approach was acknowledged her face hit the floor. “Kalyn look at me.” Her tears trickling down her cheeks and falling like lone rain to puddle on the floor. I could not see her eyes and for that I was glad because I didn’t want to see the pain that I had brought upon her, stare me in the face.

            “Kalyn look at me please,” I begged her. She would not look me in the eyes, her head just hung there staring at the floor. The puddle of tears was getting bigger and bigger, I didn’t know if I could stop her from crying. I felt bad inside because I, at that moment realized, she cared about me and that we would never be the same, because I wanted to find out what she meant by a stupid comment. I got close to her and hugged her but she pushed me away, right into her lake of tears. “I love you Kalyn and I would never accuse you of cheating on me, I don’t want you to have to go through this pain, I am not going to abandon you ok?” Still these words would not lift her head, I began to get angry inside. Is she just trying to piss me off, I mean come on I said I was sorry. “I hope we can work this out,” I said. I stood up and walked away, sorrow falling from my broken eyes. 

We went bowling I remember, it was a great night, we had a blast. I liked to think that I was a good bowler although my average is not very high. Pictures were taken that night and I fell down a few times trying to do some stupid tricks. Every time she went up to bowl she looked back and even when she looked angry I felt happiness deep down inside her. Her smile was brilliant, it made me smile even when I was in the gutter. The fire in her eyes when she was irate was a cry out to the people that loved her to ameliorate her life. Unhappiness always seemed to follow her, lurking in the shadows of her fear and hate. I wanted to relieve her of her pain, although she would never let me in on her trial. I was told when we were dating that we could last forever, it seemed that we were going to find out if that were true.

About three hours after I last had seen Kalyn, she came up to me with a note in her hand. The fear came to me and with it a vast amount of anger. I looked at her with a blazing inferno intensifying in my ice cold eyes. Feeling like I should say something I began to open my mouth but all that came out was a whimper. Hands hanging at my sides, not expecting any words I just stared at her as she drew nearer and nearer. Just as she walked by , the thin piece of paper folded to make an average square was shoved from her hand into mine. Her eyes looked at me, tears hiding behind the love that was hiding behind the fear. When she walked past me I could only stand there, legs weakening, heart throbbing, I felt alone. I hadn’t even read those words of revulsion and a notice of horror, of being abandoned crept up my spine and started to burrow into my mind. Opening the small square was one of the hardest things to do in the relationship. It read, I’m sorry I need to work on some things and I need to fix some problems I am having at home Kalyn.My knees fell to the floor and my head dropped in agony. My heart had shattered, she left me and couldn’t even tell me the real reason. The trust, love and value of our relation ship began to flood out of my eyes.

 

2 months after we stopped dating I was walking around and I noticed Kalyn in the hallway. She looked happy, happier than when we were dating. I started wondering if she was dating someone new and if she was fortunate enough to find a person that really cared for her and they were treating her the way she should be treated. I ducked away in the corner hoping she wouldn’t see me staring at her. I woke up the next morning feeling like I was better than her. Knowing full well that if I saw her again I would try to make her cry, I went to the place we first met. She was already there, with her new found boyfriend, I left to never look back.

 

 

 The End

Author's Note

Long but worth the time.

Reviews

[NCPanthersgurl]

Wow that's really sad. I feel so much emotion in every word; this is an amazing work and I'm really sorry that happened to you.