If You Saw Me

I was fourteen when I wrote this and when I found it in my jounral I couldn't believe how depressing a fourteen year old could be. Haha.

Maybe if you go there
deep inside my head
Maybe if you crawled to the spots
where the lights gone dead

Maybe If you see
the girl under neath the coats
Maybe if you heard
the soflty laying notes

Maybe if you understood
the girl I've come to be
Maybe if you looked away
from the girl you think you see

Maybe if you hide yourself
from our troubled race
Maybe if you look
to see the real true face

Maybe if you would accept
the girl I have come to be
Maybe if you tried
You'd accept a girl like me

Reviews

[Freedom's Child]

WOW, I can't believe you wrote this at14. It flows great, has great emotion and brings the reader in. Nice work.

[manish]

simple and thats the beauty of this.

[Eagle Cruagh]

An appeal for objectivity. That in and
of itself is a stroke of beauty for a 14 year
old.'
I think the poem is fresh, honest and objective.
Well constructed and tastefully done.
EXCELLENT !
----- John

[Mz]

Well, I gotta say, you were on profound 14-year-old! This amazing, truly. I love the notion of wanting someone to look behind the curtain so to speak.

Awesome!

[JustLorry]

Definitely maybe :-)
Impressed at the depth a fourteen year old can not feel, bet portray. Wonderfully done.

[ewest1220]

You were 14 when you wrote this!? I love the last stanza on this one. Very upfront and strong! Great job!

[Kacee]

Lol Thank you so much, I'm glad to know someone enjoyed it. :D

[ewest1220]

I did thank you :)