pardon my french

a poem I wrote a few years ago...a vent at another site.....when I found it, I realized every site has its "stuff"

cartoon by Tony Sohra

If you will, mademoiselle

please pardon my French

but your whining and moaning

have a malodorous stench 

Domestic adventures

notwithstanding you see

through life experience

I’ve learned a thing or three

I won’t call you “mon ami”

that would be presumptuous n’est pas?

But your undue displeasure

muddies your ink reservoir 

You see, the world will not sob

they’ll not shed a tear

when drama’s the train

and you’re the engineer 

Écoutez for a moment

put emotion on the shelf

really look in the mirror

try to analyze yourself 

Hanging out dirty laundry

won’t make it disappear

Your confabulations come off

as a bit insincere 

Silky unmentionables

are meant for the boudoir

for the eyes of your lover

your Romeo, your Czar 

And complaints are just like garters

geesh, what else can I say?

Keep them under your skirt mademoiselle

la fin, s’il vous plaît 

Reviews

[CD Campbell]

I love this. The poor me poem is boring. We moan and cry, why me? I get tired of reading that kind of stuff. Life is hard, deal with it. Very, very witty Lydi. I love the french language and have tried to learn it many times over the years, but the use of a foreign language and rhyme is daring. I am happy to have read this. CD

[Lydia Shutter]

I took four years of French in high school and college and while I am certainly not fluent in the language, I think sprinkling of it throughout a poem gives it that extra "je ne sais quois!" :) Thank you very much for your review, CD. Lydi**

[Trace]

It is always a treat to see a rhyming poem from you,
you should do them more often, you are very good at it.

I really enjoyed the story and words of advice conveyed in this cute little piece.

Trace

[Lydia Shutter]

And I am sure you remember for whom they were originally written! :) Thanks so much, Trace. Lydi**

[Trace]

you are a sweet lady

[Lydia Shutter]

Me? Hell no, it is just a vicious rumor! LOL

[Robert]

Lydia, stumbled across this poem and I am so glad I did. This is a very witty write that had me smiling from beginning to the end. I so wish I could speak French but I must say I am a little lazy when it comes to the practice of learning. I truly enjoyed this piece of wit and humor and the photo is so typical French, it was perfecto.

[Lydia Shutter]

Thank you so much, Robert. I appreciate you finding this one! Lydi**

[Tom]

French resistance at its supreme best !

A rousing rebuttal, surely they got the hint Lydia?

[Lydia Shutter]

You can hit some people over the head with a 2 x 4 and they still don't get it! LOL Thanks, Tom. Lydi**

[Tom]

And thats a fact ! lol

[Beccy]

Written with just the perfect touch of acerbic wit Lydia.

Don't we all know someone who goes through life in the way you describe; and it's not just confined to the female of the species either. :)

Beccy.

[Lydia Shutter]

No, it is not, Beccy. You are absolutely right. Thank you. Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

oh my god, this is so clever...oh those drama queens that have to lay all of their baggage opened on the platform for all to see.

[Lydia Shutter]

Thank you very much, Jacob. Lydi**

[Woody]

haha very clever and funny, Lydia. plus, the rhyme made it all the more sumptuous. I can never bring myself to really like so called free verse. old-fashioned, you see.
a lovely enjoyable read.
J'ai beaucoup aimé ce petit poème, Madame.

[Lydia Shutter]

Et je suis si heureux que vous avez aimé , mon ami! Merci beaucoup! :) I don't rhyme often, but it is a kick for me when I do. Lydi**

[Woody]

unrhymed poems look naked to me. where's the music? besides, I believe anyone can do it.
ah well, stickk in the mud, is what I am, I know.

[Lydia Shutter]

I did nothing but rhyme in my poetry for many years....but it got old. I think I can express emotions far better with free verse...to each her own...or his own as the case may be! :) There is a place for all sorts of poetry and writing in this world.

[Woody]

you're probably right. I shouldn't be whining. I'm not even a poet.

[Lydia Shutter]

But you are a talented writer!

[Woody]

I'm flattered Dear. praise from a native speaker gives me a buzz not unlike what you get after a few glasses of Champagne :)

[Lydia Shutter]

Then roll with it and have a wonderful day.

[Woody]

thank you Lydi. you, too.

[Jimmy Yetts]

If only crassness and tastelessness could be cured with a witty poem. Were it possible, Lydi, you certainly would have accomplished the task with "pardon my french."
Until that unlikely day comes, however, we'll just have to murmur among ourselves. (Provided, of course, you accept me as minimumly crass and, at least, somewhat tasteful.)
Whatever the case, I immensely enjoyed this truly clever bit of work.

[Lydia Shutter]

Smiling here....Frankie, you have no need to fear a poem like this being written about you! No, we can not cure crassness or tastelessness, but writing always helps me deal with life. thanks for the review. Lydi**

[MsJewel]

Your elegant style shines Lydi, even in this tongue in cheek witty little gem...Oh how I remember the drama...and the silky unmentionables..LOL...

This still made me giggle the second time around!

:) Julie

[Lydia Shutter]

Ultimately, she and her paramour won by buying the site, but we won because we got outta there! Thanks, Julie. Lydi**

[redzone]

I see garters flying Lydi, unmentionables flapping in the breeze, as some people have no clue as to their crassness and drama... I think we have seen many such people at the various sites. And to think, they think they are poets!!! Sacre bleu... er, so much for my French... perhaps another question would be, are they human or are they whiner?? Maybe from the planet of snark.

I remember this poem Lydi and all the drama at that site... you can speak French anytime my friend...

[Lydia Shutter]

The planet of snark....I love this!! LOL Thank you very much, Curt. I knew you would remember. Lydi**