Reflective Dissonance

With no healing
My scars ne’er keep shedding away
The slant of my mouth
Rips my lips and chips my teeth
Over and over again

I keep banging on this
Splintered door of mine
And yet I wonder why
I won’t let me in

This damned reflection
Is disconnected and withdrawn
Dirtied up and cherry-popped
Bleeding from my chewed up nails
Again and again and again

I’m so overhung and impatient
Expecting a new direction
While I keep circling the same lot
And yet I wonder why

I douse myself in shining moon
And burn my broken box away
To break this reflection that cannot lie
But I can lie to me
Over and over and over again

Reviews

[Pema Dorje]

I'm seeing that the path to Art has the spirit of illat, zillat, killat, which means to have a little less money than necessary; to have a little less than good health; and to always have critics. ;)

here your Poem uses contrasting smilies and contrapuntal enjambments to press the cacophony yet it remains a Love Lost piece ... write on!

[SHEEMA HUQ]

a deep and somewhat disturbing, seemingly unsolvable account, which made me sad, nonetheless, thoughtfully put together.

[chloe cruz]

I like how you can see and feel the feeling in this. You can picture the scene, and it seems like your inside the story... but confused, in a pretty damn good way! Thanks for entering this in the Your Done contest!

[Laura E. Aranda]

Thank you for entering this into my contest!

Good luck! Cheers to you, laura

[Adela Muresan]

Interesting poetical description of the pain caused by the denial of the truth, and not knowing yourself ( that's what I understood anywayz : P ).
The howl poem inspires a serious load of depression, and that's not bad for the type you were going for but if I were you I would have tried to fit some kind of beauty in it too.

A.M.

[.:Naiira Harlow:.]

Lovely poem and wonderful language used.
-Twilight

[Bluet_Belle]

It makes me feel self concious for the speaker. I love the lines "I douse myself in shining moon
And burn my broken box away". Beautiful

[Kenji Light]

This isn't exactly an ode, as the title asserts that it is, but the piece is still very good. I love your use of imagery and I certainly love the thought of the reflection as a lie. I think that we all hope for a reflection that can deliver a beautiful truth, but because of the impersonal nature of the reflection it only gives us a representation of ourselves that we may not want. The speaker certainly did not care for her reflection that much, as I can tell from the use of angered language. Your use of language overall was quite good. You use brilliant imagery-laden descriptions and you certainly set the tone quite well with the vocabulary that you employ in this piece. Good job! I really enjoyed reading this piece because I have a self-image issue. Some days I'm alright, and others I just hate mirrors and myself all together. I have been driven not to eat because of my negative self image and yet everyone around me tells me that I'm crazy for thinking the way I do. It's nice to have a circle of friends that watches out for your well being. That tight group is much better than the impersonal reflection any day because even though they may lie and say you look fantastic, at least that's how you feel. Anyway, I was quite impressed. Please feel free to add me and send read requests if you ever want me to read any of your work. I know that sometimes it is hard to get reviews on here because people are so busy so I can guarantee that if you send me a read request you will at the very least get a review from me. Good job! -Kenji Light