UPS instead

There I was laying in bed,
I’d s**t, showered, shaved,
And breakfasted, before
Setting foot upon the floor;
I saw my boss roasting minions,
And Sharon cheerily taking him
Coffee behind closed doors;
I’d tried to find a Matt Lauer lock
After hours, with no such luck;
I didn’t want to break his marriage up,
or accuse Sharon
Of being a w***e, so I gave up
Until I saw the FedEx man
Take too long to deliver his package one day,
and I realized
Jerry was keeping two secrets
From his wife.
Insisting on a raise and paid overtime,
he gave me a corner office, instead,
and coffee service of my own
to swallow the lie.
I told him I preferred UPS, and winked.

Reviews

[barleygirl]

I love this but I'm missing something. I don't get the significance of FedEx taking too long to deliver. Other than that, I love your playful sardonic way of spoofing the whole boss/sex scandal theme that's so prevalent these days. This might be the best thing I've seen written about this topic becuz everyone is taking everything so seriously now & yet yours is total tongue-in-cheek reciprocal exploitation! *tee! hee!* Fondly, Margie

[Maxwell Ryder]

I was going for the boss was bisexual. He like women and men, and he had a thing for 📦 delivery men in particular.

[barleygirl]

Thanks for a little illumination! *smile*

[Gee]

Rock Hudson springs to mind. Had the looks and wedge to get any woman but preferred banging Mr Butts.
Like the twist Maxwell

[Maxwell Ryder]

True, Gee. Thanks 🙏🏼 for commenting.