Dark Demise

Dark Demise

A Poem by Natalie C

Months of perseverance seep from my veins
The feeling has come, I tried not to crave
With surgical precision on an all time high
Meticulously I craft yet another perfect line
Fulfilling the addiction, marking signs.

Tomorrow will bring more of the same
Coping forever with despair and pain,
Feel this cold, stainless piece of steel
A forbidden friend that helps reveal
What words cannot say in this ordeal.

Frustrations come, hold nothing back
Bleed starts with unstable cracks
The balance lost, begins to cry
For that ever watchful demons eye
Inside he waits for his time.

Already torn, this ripped up heart
Shamelessly follows this gloomy path
Once part of a cycle, staying alive
Crimson destruction now waits to die
Nothing left, no reason to try.

So forbidden friend, seduce my soul
One more time, to make us whole
You have me hooked, bonded by lust,
My true desire is your dark touch
Forever you are the one I trust.

 

 


© 2009 Natalie C



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Featured Review

Brilliantly dark. Of course it is a disaster, but there is a beauty and fascination about it. We humans are endlessly odd in our ways, in what we do to others and ourselves. I almost swoon just thinking about the blood in me. The thought of your steel friend shocks me to my core.

That said the poem is a great read. The idea of having an affair with the dark force is alluring. We have to watch, to sense how it is for this strange love. We are somehow witnessing an exquisitely private and intimate act as we read.

Posted 5 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Your dark work is among the best I've read. The moment captured so marvelously and the imagery takes the reader on a journey where we want to know more, know all.... even if the answer sends chills up and down our spines... Last stanza is my favorite though the entire verse is so very exceptional, Natalie. 'seduce my soul/One more time, to make us whole...' love it.

Posted 5 Years Ago


Brilliantly dark. Of course it is a disaster, but there is a beauty and fascination about it. We humans are endlessly odd in our ways, in what we do to others and ourselves. I almost swoon just thinking about the blood in me. The thought of your steel friend shocks me to my core.

That said the poem is a great read. The idea of having an affair with the dark force is alluring. We have to watch, to sense how it is for this strange love. We are somehow witnessing an exquisitely private and intimate act as we read.

Posted 5 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This speaks to me about addiction. If this is your intention, I can surely relate. You sparked emotion in me in this piece. Your raw honesty is powerful.

Posted 5 Years Ago


That was spinetinglingly sensual... Those who are bad for us always have such an appeal... you can really grip the reader with your creative expression.

Posted 7 Years Ago


Amazing poem and a photo to match. Similarly, I use photographs for inspiration in my poetry; but your poem had a dark, painful, mysterious edge to it. The rhyme, although unecessary, made the poem clear and imaginable. Again, amazing poem.

Posted 7 Years Ago


Wow, I love this! It's so deeply written. I can really sence the erge here! You are a very talented writer. All I can say is, keep giving me mre! Great stuff! :-)

Posted 7 Years Ago


This poem is so good. Photo made the words come alive. Every line added up and create a painful vision. Description and your detail brought this poem to life. A excellent poem.
Coyote

Posted 7 Years Ago


So chilling! Wow the stainless steel imagery is really incredible. The dark words you have crafted dance on death. A morbid determination rises over a sense of hopelessness and despair. This writing really does stick with the reader and makes you want to reread to pull more meaning, but it's scary to do. These lines are my favorite and are so darkly well conjured:
"Already torn, this ripped up heart
Shamelessly follows this gloomy path
Once part of a cycle, staying alive
Crimson destruction now waits to die
Nothing left, no reason to try."
Fantastically dark write. I'm a new fan of your work!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

umm the topic is a bit morbid. but alright that is what you are going for.
the Vocabulary is astonishing. You have a real word ability.
the flow is really well done and pulls the reader through.
excellent write.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

A very powerful and dark poem, filled with imagery, which seems to linger in my mind! The primary emotions which this evoked in me, included angst, forbidden love, despair and the very essence of death. This is only the second of your poems, which I have reviewed, and it's a fine piece of writing!

This poem captures most of the elements, which I would use to define dark poetry. A classic case, of a writer's dark yet creative vision, expressed so eloquently in the poetic form. Thankyou, for sharing this with us!


Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on May 12, 2009

Author

Natalie C
Natalie C

South Africa, South Africa



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