Awakening...the losing battle of an innocent soul

Meet Azazalle

 

Awakening…the losing battle of an innocent soul

 

Falling apart around my ears, my hopes give way to bitter tears,

As piece by piece they break away, dissolving into yesterday,

I hold on tight but still they flee, lost within a memory,

And though I strive to meet my goals, my aching heart will not be told,

 

It beats with passion yet untouched…wanting, needing, asking much,

And with each day that passes by I battle harder with the lie,

I cannot feel the warmth of love, or hear the angels from above,

For in my heart an empty space is all that searches for God’s grace,

 

I want forgiveness for my sins, yet still I cling to needful things,

And with the coming of the moon my senses stir within the tomb,

They reach for all I cannot hold, and shiver as the dark unfolds,

The gaping void that is my soul embraces pleasure, lost and cold…  

Reviews

[Prudence Desideria]

I love the flow of this, the rhyme that doesn't become overbearing but still adds up to everything this work becomes. It reminds me of that Metallica song, the sandman, and the way they used the night prier 'as I lay me down to sleep, pray the lord...' etc etc.

The contents are interesting and emotional, like this swirl of thoughts and memories that are a bit hard to grasp, almost a grayish mist, but simultaneously draws the reader in very well.

"I want forgiveness for my sins, yet still I cling to needful things" Love that line. So descriptive and well put.

Good work, thanks for sharing it here...
/Prue

[justjenn_2u]

You express how it feels to carry something inside that fills you with fear very well. I like that your poem is realistic.

[Ruth Y. Nott]

I want forgiveness for my sins, but still I cling to needful things,
And with the coming of the moon my senses stir within the tomb,
They reach for all I cannot hold, and shiver as the dark unfolds,
The gaping void that is my soul embraces pleasure, lost and cold�

I love this poem! This last stanza just reaches out, grabs me and shouts "Look! She writes from your own heart!"

[Jaxson Phoenix]

An excellent write. The words flow of the page like music and reaches deep into the readers soul. It is a magnificent work of poetry. Thoughtful, provocative, intuitive. A pleasure to read. Keep up the good work.

[__Flaw__]

Well, the header says all...losing battle and everything...'cos after reading your poem, I felt exactly that.
The poem is written beautifully...it depicts a picture of someone, lost...perhaps lost on the paths/roads that lead to somewhere we call harmony...destiny...or perhaps...to a deeper note...lost within his/her own existence...as it's again obvious that, he/she is unable to divert, knowing that it should be for better sake, but is unable...confined into a space that has no light...just dark void space.

Well, these r just my thoughts...your piece is beautiful...but i hope, it's not about YOU.
Cheers.

[Rain]

This character from within your mind..off the pages of a book. How real is she to you ? She seems so helpless , like she's given in to her fate. A write like you can slide bits and pieces of the characters in her mind with her own fears and demons. I read this as the thoughts of a make believe creation of your mind. I could be wrong, because the emotions seem so vivid you must be somewhere in this piece. This is a very strong piece. Rain..