At Midnight, We Ride

A man copes with the zombie apocalypse in the only way he knows how.

Shuffling, groaning, moaning, creaking,

never speaking, only the same repetition of that

ungodly sigh. Scraping at my door, and I wonder how they

made it past my moat filled with piranhas and

my flaming volkswagen siege engine.

Lamplight illuminating the folded steel

of my broadsword, pulling tight the strings of

my luchador mask and buckling on my spiked scale mail.

Death metal blaring from my portable sound

system as I jump out the second story

window and begin to kick heads, my

broadsword a whirlwind of steel and my boots

are dynamos of grievous bodily harm. Blood and brains and

unidentifiable, clotted body fluids fly past my

face and cover my armor (599

dollars on ebay, plus tax). I let loose

my blood curdling warcry, dousing my sword

in gasoline and setting it ablaze. As I pull a zombie’s head off,

my mind wanders and I remember that I didn’t

remember to brush my teeth after dinner.

Crying havoc, I let loose the dogs of war;

their names are Toby and Mr. Budders. On my

Harley, black and silver with flames painted on the side, we fly into

the night, sweaty demons in search of violence,

glory, and twinkies from the local 7/11.

Author's Note

Always try to make the best of things. Twinkies help with that.

Reviews

[Natasha Zoya]

This is a wonderful ode to all action video games, t.v., etc!

[SGCool]

Thanks! I'm glad you liked it!

[Patrick Jinks]

Ahahaha epic :D
I find it very refreshing to hear a poem not about flowers and heartbreak. The cynical tone and cavalier measures really paint a picture. I don't know if you've ever seen Red Dwarf, but this character reminds me somewhat of Ace Rimmer.

[SGCool]

Dude, Red Dwarf is my jam. Definitely one of the best shows on television. Also, I'm glad you liked the piece! I don't generally write poetry, being more short story minded. This is something I wrote for a college class a few years ago.

Stoke me a clipper...I'll be back for Christmas.