My Artificial Cherry

Darkness and the taste of artificial cherries have surrounded me since I last wrote your name.

 

Even through the passionate elation and kisses I've received from you, this is unavoidable.

 

I write your elegantly hideous name at my happiest, at my saddest; my emptiest and fullest.

 

Vulnerability seeps in; I need the person who encounters this scrawling to feel its heartbeat as I do.

 

 

Every drama, affair or event that could have played out, does not and will not, if you have your way.

 

Now, as I transcribe your name for the final time and as I hate you most; I need you more than ever.

Reviews

[InkBlack]

Hmmmm...
do cherries have a significant connection to you and this person? Or is is simply just a "oh I think I'll use cherries for my poem?"

Anyway, that's unimportant. I like how you go back and forth from hating this person to loving this person in a split second and I have to agree with Adela, that last line was great! Probably the best line in the entire poem :) I'm also a huge fan of the "elegantly hideous name" line, oxymorons always seem to catch my attention for some reason.

My only real suggestion is that you deliver the rest of the lines the same way as you did the last stanza but you don't have to. I'll be in touch ;)

P.S. READ MY DANG BLOODY ROSES POEM ALREADY!

[Adela Muresan]

The last line is by far the best part of it...so true...I've been there.
I think you really need to change the format of the poem, and work an the euohony.
Anywayz 100/100 for the brilliant last line.

A.M.

[Peter Grantham]

I liked this a lot. Is this about a particular person?

[Emily Rose]

Wow. I really liked the specific imagery and the tension between love and hate that you created in the poem. Good use of imagery!