Relatively Like Me.

Relatively Like Me.

A Poem by Tinotenda Nyevedzanai
"

Another Challenge - ATC

"
Excited to meet.
Is that the right word?
Nervous, anxious 
- Stare to the feet
, where it's safe.
Shock.
He looks just like me,
- But well dressed.
Well mannered probably
Not a mess not like me
Not a failure
Not a disgrace to the family.
,but we are family. 
"Hello." - He speaks
- Stare to the feet
,where it's safe. 
A grown man should be able to find words,
So many questions but speechless still
it's absurd, trapped within my own
insecurity, I can't offer him a drink
I don't have any money
"Would you like a coffee?" 
his smile is kind, just like mine.
I nod, I contacted him. 
How was he so confident?
My long lost twin,
Reunited not knowing a thing
about each other.
- We discover we don't need to speak.
we just sit and sip our latte's 
As if we come here every week.
I know we were cut from the same cloth,
Disguised in rags and silk,
The same blood
Regained lost brotherly love.

© 2015 Tinotenda Nyevedzanai


Author's Note

Tinotenda Nyevedzanai
Challenge "Identical twins separated at birth, one brought up in poverty and the other in wealth finally meet as Adults."

- Did I succeed or fail?

My Review

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Featured Review

My father was a wanderer. He had five wives and 11 kids I know about. I met brothers and sisters I didn't know I had. Your story is true. Family is family. Blood create a bond never forgotten. The poem felt true. You did a excellent job with the poem.
Coyote

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tinotenda Nyevedzanai

9 Years Ago

Thank you that's lovely to hear that this poem was able to touch you on a personal and positive leve.. read more
Coyote Poetry

9 Years Ago

It did and you are welcome.



Reviews

My father was a wanderer. He had five wives and 11 kids I know about. I met brothers and sisters I didn't know I had. Your story is true. Family is family. Blood create a bond never forgotten. The poem felt true. You did a excellent job with the poem.
Coyote

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tinotenda Nyevedzanai

9 Years Ago

Thank you that's lovely to hear that this poem was able to touch you on a personal and positive leve.. read more
Coyote Poetry

9 Years Ago

It did and you are welcome.
I felt that the essence of the souls was captured and I simply saw them as two
people. The visual of the description makes it more powerful. This could be a great
2-3 minute short film with the poem as narration.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tinotenda Nyevedzanai

9 Years Ago

That's a great idea and I'm flattered I don't have the skills to do that though!
Lovely wording!
Well done!

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tinotenda Nyevedzanai

9 Years Ago

Thank you Emily :)
This is nice and they say twins sometimes have mental telepathy between them nice job

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tinotenda Nyevedzanai

9 Years Ago

Thank you for the review :) Glad you liked it
W R Stowe

9 Years Ago

Your quite welcome
Very good piece yet again! The flow is great and the poem seems to have a rhythm that keeps the reader reading!

I know we were cut from the same cloth,

Disguised in rags and silk,

The same blood

Regained lost brotherly love.

That's my favorite part. So full of meaning and sentimentality! Very nice piece. Keep it up!

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tinotenda Nyevedzanai

9 Years Ago

Thank you :):) I love these little writing challenges, you should give it a go!
I really enjoyed this, almost gave up in the beginning because of the punctuation, unorthodox to say the least. You developed it well and pulled us in deeper into the narrative and at the end we had a complete and interesting story.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tinotenda Nyevedzanai

9 Years Ago

Thank you, I like to play with punctuation sometimes really pleased you enjoyed it :)

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7 Reviews
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Added on February 1, 2015
Last Updated on February 2, 2015

Author

Tinotenda Nyevedzanai
Tinotenda Nyevedzanai

Dallas, Kent



About
Just a fifteen year old who enjoys reading and writing. Music makes me happy. New works are in the making and are going to be published soon more..

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