The breath of discord

A Poem by blaek

l need you,you need me.We need each other.l have always wanted to be loved by someone in the way that you loved me.Run my hands in their hair , and slide it further until l place it behind their neck, kissing them in a manor infinitely better than the last.Outstretch my years drawing every bit of happiness from the depth of my soul to feed her smile,her hazel eyes and those puffy cheeks.See them flush over and over with so much love it would make heaven envious even with all those stars at her mercy.

We were enough,we were right for each other,we were happy together, and yet l am in a box with these solid walls serving as constrictions.My lungs caving in as the air outside fills with more love than l have within me.My feet and body still and rigid hoping the weight of depression from this loss doesn't spell my epic doom.The day you left me l remember it feeling like l was chasing you through a hall of mirrors.My mind distorting like the reflections on each and every one of those mirrors with our distance getting bigger and bigger. Suddenly l could not catch you and you were so far beyond l was reduced to imagining the glow from your tail lights with everything reduced to ash.

Across the street and at the end of Hallways you are with him and so in love that every memory we made is strangling me in my head.l am falling so far l am begging anyone or anything to save me.Losing you has made me feel so alone l think twice with every knife l hold, every poison that fails to escape my sight and at the edge of each and everyone of the tall buildings l aimlessly climb.

Suffocating from the piles of dirt you buried me under l have given up salvaging my way through the accusations, the lies and everything wrong about me.,My nails broken,fingers left blistered and bleeding l am a planet too far from ever tasting satisfaction ,all because you have robbed me of my securities and l love you still.l am imperfect and who can love me when all l will ever want is you.Even without that l am far from a boy enough to be seen.