9 Year Storm

9 Year Storm

A Poem by k
"

"I was ten when the storm clouds first rolled in."

"

I was ten when the storm clouds first rolled in.

I watched the sky go dark

and the sun retreat.

The sky was grey

and orange

and purple.

But the air was calm

and still

and heavy.

And then I was twelve.

I saw the flash before I heard the thunder,

low

and deep

and coming from every direction at once,

a warning.

And then I was thirteen.

All at once

the rain started to fall,

hard

and cold

and impossible to see through.

And then I was fourteen.

The lightning licked its way across the sky,

like veins

like a crack in the ceiling

like a pattern in the plaster.

The thunder got louder,

not deep,

not low,

but loud and sharp,

cracking like a whip

echoing through my skull.

And then I was fifteen.

The lightning struck a boxelder tree

and splintered the wood.

Beneath the stripped bark

the tree is red

like lipstick

like blood

like fire.

And then I was seventeen.

The wind tore through

and nearly took me with it.

It slammed against the house

and the trees

and all of us outside.

It shouted curses at us

and it flung debris.

But we dodged

and we survived

and still we lived in the storm.

The thunder

the lightning

the rain

were all constant.

There was no end in sight

and nowhere was safe.

But then I was eighteen.

The wind died down

to a pleasant breeze,

warm

and soft

and light.

The downpour slowed to rain

then to a drizzle

then to nothing at all.

The lightning receded

and the thunder went with it.

Finally the clouds went too.

And now I am nineteen

and the storm has passed.


© 2017 k



Author's Note

k
The revision process for this particular poem is still ongoing so I would love to hear any input! Thank you for reading!
[note: revisions were added 10/12/17]

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I think the events described in this offering do not represent an actual storm, but rather, events in the speaker's life. We could be seeing the onset of a mental illness like depression, with its attendant trauma and final control, or possibly ongoing episodes of domestic violence in the speaker's adolescent years. Some of the images can easily be taken that way. Whatever the case, the final lines indicate the storm has passed, and that gives us a measure of relief. Sparely and clearly worded, with a fine use of imagery. Well done.

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

k

1 Month Ago

Thank you for your kind words! You are right on with your analysis.



Reviews

A very nice allegory of life and going from one phase to another.
At first, I thought it was just a memory from your childhood before I realized you were talking about a journey. I can't say much but congratulations on surviving the storm. Although I believe that there is still more from where that came from. I, myself am still rowing this life boat in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean and fighting the storms that come each day.

Beautiful piece. Have a nice day! :D
-Cookie

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


This is quite a description of the growing up years. Beautifully done.

Posted 4 Weeks Ago


Fascinating, I like it :)

Posted 1 Month Ago


You take the metaphor and use it well to describe the process of adolescence and the struggle many have to weather that storm. So glad it ended well. Love your strap line; that is indeed moi aussi!

Posted 1 Month Ago


Your poem describes what it is like living in a thunder storm. I think many a teenager has stormy time of it. But I am glad that when she was 19 the storm finally passed. I think the contrasting short and long lines work well ... a bit like lightening flashes. Also very good description.

Posted 1 Month Ago


I think the events described in this offering do not represent an actual storm, but rather, events in the speaker's life. We could be seeing the onset of a mental illness like depression, with its attendant trauma and final control, or possibly ongoing episodes of domestic violence in the speaker's adolescent years. Some of the images can easily be taken that way. Whatever the case, the final lines indicate the storm has passed, and that gives us a measure of relief. Sparely and clearly worded, with a fine use of imagery. Well done.

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

k

1 Month Ago

Thank you for your kind words! You are right on with your analysis.

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6 Reviews
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Added on September 13, 2017
Last Updated on October 12, 2017
Tags: poem, poetry, storm, lightning, thunder, abuse, domestic abuse, dark, healing

Author

k
k

About
I am an English student who (surprise) loves to write. I love reviewing the work of others and reviews on my work are of course always welcome. Feel free to message me to chat about writing or ask for.. more..

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