Carnival Games

Carnival Games

A Poem by Marie Harrison
"

A love poem.

"
Carnival Games
 
Tiny glass rings tossed lightly,
bounce upon the bottles
that hold 8 ounces.
 
Time after time,
they fly through the air,
bouncing from bottle to bottle.
 
Money exchanged,
hand to hand again.
 
From time to time,
he leans over to kiss
his dear and pat her rear,
 
Tossing more and more rings,
more time goes by,
just to lean over for a gentle kiss
and the chance to pat her rear.


© 2010 Marie Harrison


Advertise Here
Want to advertise here? Get started for as little as $5
wordswiz editing
empower your writing

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

The silly things guys will do for a chance to touch a girl's butt. I loved your idea. As poetry goes, try to put an even number of lines in each stanza and make sure the number of syllables in each line match up a bit better. Other than that, it was fun to read.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

The silly things guys will do for a chance to touch a girl's butt. I loved your idea. As poetry goes, try to put an even number of lines in each stanza and make sure the number of syllables in each line match up a bit better. Other than that, it was fun to read.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I don't know enough about poetry to critic it for you, but I enjoyed reading it. The concept is great.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Well It had potential. In the world of Poetry you have an irregular number of lines per stanza. I suggest a restructuring of the stanzas. As for "pat her rear" it seems so out of place compared to the rest. I read it and say to myself, that doesn't fit well their. I do like the concept, so please don't think I'm bashing your poem, I just want to help. ^_^

Posted 9 Years Ago


This is the story of a boy or a man playing a carnival game in order to get closer with his date. A silly carnival poem.

Posted 9 Years Ago



Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

384 Views
4 Reviews
Rating
Added on June 4, 2010
Last Updated on June 21, 2010
Tags: Love, Lust, Fun

Author

Marie Harrison
Marie Harrison

Atlanta, GA



About
Momma told me to get out and enjoy life, so now I'm going to dance. more..

Writing

Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..