Another little piece of my soul

The leaves are slowly turning grey,
The hours are quietly passing by and,
The seasons are fading in circles.
As i watch it all happen,
My heart is painfully breaking.
I smile as he walks by,
holding the hand of his "new love",
when we talk at night,
he asks if everything's all right,
I tell him I have to go.
I hide the truth from him,
never tell him that i love him,
he'll never understand anyway...
If only he knew, but i can't tell him that,
everytime i see him with another girl,
another little peice of my soul dies inside...

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

A very strong poem. I like how you open the poem. A poem of the heart. A lot of emotion and pain in the poem. Hard to back away when we care and love someone. A excellent poem.
Coyote

[freelancejouster]

the message and images brought by this poem are powerful and sad, by heart breaks for you a little, darling.

criticism: only a few lines rhyme, which sounds awkward. if you're going to rhyme, do it throughout, and if you're not, find words better equipped for the job. also 'grey' means old or aging, 'gray' is a color. if you meant the leaves are aging, then my mistake, but.

[Hatchling]

Nicely done! You can feel the pain in this poem.

[D S Rollins]

Very sad... but I can so feel that pain as I read the writing.

[Thomas Sawyer]

Sad poem. Sometimes you just have to declare your love!