Part I

The beginning

Part I

 

“Here you go, Daciana,” Silvestra murmured, setting down a bowl laden with food and rubbing her pet wolf behind the ears. A deep growl of happiness rose deep in the wolf’s snowy chest as she stuck her long snout into the pile, chewing noisily. Leaning against the wooden door frame, she watched enviously as her silver-eyed companion eat with a ravenous fervor without a care. She’s so lucky, she thought. She doesn’t need to worry about the Smoke…

“Hey, Silv!” a cheery voice floated from the door. She glanced up to see Lavi rubbing the dried mud off his dark red sneakers on the welcoming mat anxiously, spring air ruffling his red-sienna hair. He met her eyes with his deep tawny ones and grinned. “Well? You coming to school or what?”

“Of course, you idiot,” she replied crossly, lifting her bag off the back of the chair. “I wouldn’t miss today for the world.”

His laugh was light-hearted as he followed her out. “I wouldn’t either.”

As they rode the outdoor train together, clouds of thoughts swirled around them and not much was passed between them because the words would get lost in the cacophony of noise. The other passengers paid no attention to others, burying themselves deep in their own world created by technology. Silvestra loved watching the scenery fly past, too blurred to make out the details. She let the rocking of the train lull her into relaxation. Her long mahogany hair fell into face, tickling her nose. Her black gold-flecked eyes looked but didn’t see.

When the train came to a stop, Silvestra and Lavi were the first off because others had to reconnect themselves back to reality from their own world. At the same moment, they caught sight of the familiar blonde-white hair in the crowd.

“Azazel!” they yelled. They were rewarded with a wide grin and an excited wave. Bystanders immediately moved aside to avoid running into the reunion of three childhood friends, a few smiling when they saw the trio of youths laughed and flung jumbled words at each other.

Silvestra was the first to be coherent. “Oh my god, Azazel,” she exclaimed after receiving his full-bodied hug. His hand remained on her waist, sending shivers of warmth through her. “You look so much better!”

“Like you were never in an accident,” Lavi agreed, playfully hitting his friend’s shoulder.

Azazel’s laugh was easy and incredibly contagious. “It’s all thanks to Silv’s father,” he said, dark blue eyes shining. “Good thing your pa was there, I thought I was a goner…Thank him for me, will you? Didn’t get around to…”

She nodded, too pleased to say anything. Azazel’s smile became gentle and, bending a little, nuzzled her tenderly, producing a deep blush from her. When he let go and she adverted her eyes, she couldn’t help but notice Lavi turning away with an expression of torn ambivalence. Suddenly, a voice called for him.

Lavi’s smile was a little regretful when he turned back to them. “Sorry, I have to go. Have some stuff to do before school starts…See you around?” He directed his question more towards Azazel, face a little uneasy.

Azazel chuckled, gesturing for him to go on ahead. “Of course.” Lavi’s affable beam returned and he lightly punched his friend’s outstretched fist. Nodding to Silvestra, he took off into the distance.

Watching him go with an amused expression, Azazel remarked, more to himself than her, “That guy hasn’t changed one bit.” Then he gazed down at her, expression and deep blue eyes warm. “I missed you,” he murmured.

She nodded. “Me too.”

“You know,” he said as they strode side by side on the stony path of the train station. “Once I saw you, I felt much better.”

She laughed. “Really?”

His eyes twinkled. “You have your own healing power…” They chatted together while they sauntered along the paved sidewalk, with tall skyscrapers touching the sky. He was close and his deep eyes smiling. Too soon, the almost metallic walls of the school appeared.

He stopped on the smooth road leading to the large building. From the emptiness of the street, first period started already, but school was the last thing on their minds. His eyes surveyed the treeless area, feeling the familiarity of the school grounds. As she stood behind, she couldn’t help but notice how nicely the sunlight dyed his blond hair.

He briefly closed his eyes as if absorbing the scenery. Faint car-honks echoed in the distance. Then, like a statue coming alive, he stirred. His sapphire eyes turned and met hers “Silvestra…” he breathed. She loved the sound of his voice and almost leaned in to soak in more. He took the step towards her. “Silvestra,” he said. “I…”

Suddenly, rusty-smelling blood erupted from his mouth. A scream rose in her throat as the sluggish liquid stained his lips and chin. All movement in her body stopped as her frantic mind tried to comprehend the situation. His fearful eyes rapidly melted to incomprehension and finally to helplessness. He reached a hand towards her, lips moving wordlessly. After a few shaky steps, his knees gave away and he fell forward onto the ground like a puppet cut of its guiding strings, deep scarlet staining the black road. In her haste, she tripped, still unable to tear her eyes away. A pair of arms caught her and lowered her gently to the ground.

Lavi’s tawny eyes were wide in fear. “Azazel!” he roared. He let go of her and bound to his best friend’s side, shaking the flaccid shoulder. As they watched, the life just seemed to slip away. Lavi stopped and stared blankly at the malevolent substance on his hands. Silvestra, still sitting on the ground, couldn’t tear her eyes away from the face that was alive only moments ago. Abruptly, she noticed a strange yet somewhat familiar scent enveloping her.

Then, out of Azazel’s back, white fire sprouted. The air suddenly went cold as if the fire fed on warmth instead of oxygen. It rapidly manifested itself into the muscled shape of a massive spirit wolf with its head bowed. Its white paws floated a few centimeters over his body. As white fire crackled around it, its eyes snapped open and revealed them to be deep blue. The exact shade as Azael’s. It bared its bloodstained fangs at her. She felt hatred radiating from it that made her shiver as she was drawn into its piercing blue depths.

Images and disconnected words flashed through her mind. A mother’s warm tongue…her heated body…her scalding milk…taken away…must kill…kill the one that killed me…She realized, with a start, these were the thoughts of the wolf.

Faint footsteps sounded behind her. The connection broken, the wolf swung its massive head towards the forest. With a final glance, it leapt into the air and galloped soundlessly into wall of leaves, quickly joining with the shadows. She could barely hear Lavi’s voice in her ear…

 

Azazel never woke again. The sound of cries and tears wouldn’t register in her head as she stood before his coffin. Sadness slipped between the many people like a dark ominous cloud, affecting everyone. Unseen tears slipped endlessly down her face. Azazel’s death seemed impossible as the sun setting in the east instead of the west.

“Silvestra…Silvestra…” his voice played like a broken record, repeating her name.

As she stepped forward, she remembered how Azazel and Lavi had comforted her when her mother died a year ago. “Stay strong,” they had said to her. “We will always be here for you. Come talk to us anytime…” Her eyes closed in pain. With her hair falling around her face like a mahogany curtain, she set her white rose onto the glossy black wood that separated his cold body from her.

The woman behind her stepped up to replace her. One by one, people in black paid their respects to him. Incoherent babble slipped from her grasp. Words were passed around and fragments registered momentarily in her numb mind.

“…was just getting better…”

“…killed by a lunatic…”

“…so young…barely got to live…”

She closed her eyes and shut out the words. “Azazel…” her whispered voice cracked unnaturally. Lavi, who was standing beside her, hesitated then curled his arm around her shoulder to comfort her. If she wasn’t so unfeeling, she would’ve appreciated this kind gesture. But she was only aware of a sudden warmth quivering from suppressed cries. His head bowed and a few tears escaped down his cheeks.

After a while, she turned to the seemingly incessant stream of silent or sobbing people. Though his body was only a few feet away, encased in ebony wood, she felt a widening abyss separating Azazel from her and Lavi. His pleasant and comforting light faded into the sinewy fingers of eternal darkness and she could almost hear the door close with a muffled click.

Lavi’s hand found hers. Senses flooding back, Silvestra gazed into her friend’s downcast eyes. He tried a smile and nodded. Together they faced the coffin. Many of the people had left and only a few stayed in corners to cry into each other’s shoulders. He was loved, she thought. He was deeply loved…and therefore, deeply grieved for…She briefly wondered who would cry for her if she died…She shook the thoughts away.

Tentatively, she reached out with her free hand. Her fingers grazed the smooth wood. One hand felt fire and the other felt ice. “Azazel…” they whispered together as they felt a piece of their eternal friendship break off and fall into the gaping darkness.

 

 

Author's Note

Any suggestions?

Reviews

[The Perfectionist]

I had read this over once already without reviewing it, but the second time through now I've noticed a few things. First, and most predominantly, there are several points in the chapter where it feels like you are just trying too hard. Every now and again a sentence will not read quite right; not because it's an error necessarily, but because it just doesn't quite make as much sense as it should.

"As they rode the outdoor train together, clouds of thoughts swirled around them and not much was passed between them because the words would get lost in the cacophony of noise."

That's one example of it; there are a few more. You also have a few grammatical problems, nothing major, mostly just leaving out a word in a sentence.

"Azazel’s smile became gentle and, bending a little, nuzzled her tenderly, producing a deep blush from her"

It should say HE nuzzled her. Again, that's one example, there are a handful of other ones.

You have a very strong vocabulary, but you lack the grammatical knowledge to use it properly. This is a fairly short chapter, and there are a lot of the errors that I mentioned above strewn throughout. It's not exactly a deal-breaker, but it's something you would want to look into.

[Amelia Harris]

Wow! I really liked it. Great description. I love it when people have a large vocabulary and describe their story vividly. I loved your characters and the emotion they portrayed held me till the very end. The only thing I would suggest is try not to repeat the same adjective more than twice, especially if they are only a couple of sentences apart. And you might need to rephrase some sentences, they are a little confusing. But otherwise, great job!

[Dante Walker]

Very good, however it seems as if too much happens in one chapter. Granted there are more chapters (Parts) but you meet people... then they're walking to school, most likely the two are dating, then one dies and a few lines later, their having his funeral... good work tho ^.^