A Hippo Through Time

Just a little poem turned short-ish story about a hippo traveling through time.

I am Lawrence, the time traveling hippo

With my wonderful time machine, there's no telling where I'll go

Maybe I'll go near, perhaps even far

and who knows, I might stop by the land of the dinosaur.

I remember getting in and taking my first trip,

The excitement was overwhelming, The wrong switches I did flip.

While I intended to go to the future, I ended up in the past

The machine stopped and I was in the old west, I needed to act fast.

Luckily for me I thought ahead, and had costumes made

For this period, I'm thinking a sheriff with a nice hat for shade.

I step out of the machine and begin to wander,

Really hoping there is a town just over yonder.

To my surprise, I located a town after just a little walking,

I felt out of place, people stared and I could tell about me they were talking.

Had my disguise failed? Did they see through my ruse?

A saloon? I'll head inside I thought, how could I lose?

The doors swung open, the bustling place got real quiet.

To Be continued...

Author's Note

It isn't finished yet, but I like what I have so far and I hope you do too.

Reviews

[RubyOmma]

I love this. But it feels more like a short story than a poem. I think you should try to turn it into a short story form. I love the opening line, catchy and engaging. "There's no telling where I'll go". Love it. But as you said, it is unfinished. Needs an ending as powerful as the beginning. And a direction. What are you trying to tell the reader? Keep it clear through out. Poems need to be direct in their emotional intent. This is really good though, and I want to see how it ends.

[Joshua McNay]

I am probably going to turn it into a short story here soon, as even when I try to keep it short I want to keep writing it. I even wrote and ending that I liked but since I want to keep writing I just put it aside it went like this.

How can you stop it, you're only a hippopotamus
He looked back and said, don't worry, I got this...

That was what I had but the short story is where it is heading. I just wanted to share it. I am glad you enjoyed it.

[RubyOmma]

Great work. Anytime you want to swing something by me feel free. You've obviously got talent and a great sense of humor. Also maybe review my writing to return the favor?