Escaping my pain

I am sick and tired of waiting for my heart to heal its pain
I wish it would stop beating
My mind is all over the place being confused and lost
I try to be nice to others
Why do people I care about the most lie into my red eyes?
I am tired of crying,
all of the time, my soul already vanished into the unknown
My dreams died
I feel like I am slowly dieing from being lonely
I try to run away
But I fractured my ankle bone from trying to find a new home
My love left me for another lover
Another day will not help all my pain feel numb
Silence is not helping
I should of known he did not love me when he kept slapping my swollen face
But I looked the other way
I just want to hold something that will help me
Sick of trying and caring
I am always failing, my life is full of disappointments
No one cares
I am used to my pain hurting, used to going to the Hospital
While others stare
My heart is cracking, lacking, breaking into smaller pieces
My days are wasting away
Lonely nights are freezing being alone, crying my puffy eyes out
I am always bewildered
Everyday is the worst day of my painful life
I do not understand anything
I am used to being ignored, while I just dream for a better day
I am a unloved creature
Hiding from the darkness that is controlling the core of my body
I am losing myself
From a broken heart bigger than the shiny moon
I still feel blood
From cutting my own arms off, since I know no one wants to hug me
Sick of living this way
I need someone but no one comes to save my life
No one misses me
I rather feel nothing at all, always pretending everything is fine
I pick up my bloody razor again
Push it towards my broken heart to end my painful life
I close my eyes to end my time
Finally getting what I want, I can not feel depressed anymore
My pain was to real to bare

Author's Note

Did you feel my pain? Did you enjoy it?

Reviews

[Im His Daughter]

abuse is terrible both doing & receiving.. i lived with abuse from my ex husband i know this pain in here you speak of.. However i also know what it feels like to be free from the pain.. depression is a hard one to let go of.. I found that God helps me with that. I know that no one will ever love me as much as he does. I hope you find that love for yourself... You should read my Poem "My Personal Definition of What Love is" great poem here..

[Megan]

One thing I like about it is how it's so emotional and how you can almost feel the pain in it. Also, from "Hiding from the.....still feel blood" were my favorite lines.

One point of criticism is that you might want to organize it a little bit more, it could help with the flow of the poem?

It was relatable and I enjoyed reading it! thanks!

[A.E. Reed]

Yes to both questions (love the Gir picture by the way). That was really moving, and the way you wrote it mad me feel like I had lived through that and at times I feel like that too (just for different reasons) but I really felt like I was there with you. Nice job.

-A.E. Reed

[Wolf]

yes i felt your pain and yes i enjoyed it.